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Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Skull Bomb from Jason Freeny x Mighty Jaxx Dropping January 2nd



    If this is any indication of how many cool things are going to come out in 2014 then I'm gonna have to go ahead a find a good bankruptcy attorney.  How cool is this?  The answer is "very cool".  Jason Freeny and Mighty Jaxx got together to create this Skull Bomb that releases world wide on January 2nd.  For a mere $79 (can I borrow $79?) you can be one of 100 people to own this solid resin sculpture that would probably cause a slight panic if you tried to take it through airport security.  Get one for yourself by visiting http://www.mightyjaxx.bigcartel.com/ and start thinking of some really good answers for all of the questions you'll be asked in that dark little airport security room as some government agent snaps his rubber gloves on.  

We're a Hit in the Ukraine!!!!!




    I love looking at where my readers are from.  Today I learned that after the United States, most of my readers are from the Ukraine!!!!!  I had no idea that they liked toys so much over there or that they were learning about them from my humble website.  I love you all and am prepared to star in all of your future movies and tv shows.  

Monday, December 30, 2013

Wheelhouse's Rivals Vinyl Figures Set 2 Now Live on Kickstarter



    Like having a baby with your cousin, toy making is risky business.  You need great ideas, the ability to follow through with a long project, a thick skin to take the criticism of message board lurkers, and most importantly, a hefty pile of money.  And that's just to get your dreams manufactured.  Wheelhouse have used Kickstarter in the past to successfully fund their first series of Rivals vinyl figures and now they have returned to it to make the second a reality.  By now we all know how Kickstarter works:  you determine how much you are able to contribute and based on that you get cool stuff in return.  This is by far one of the most affordable campaigns I've ever seen, where a mere $60 will get you both fully painted figures.  If you like what you see you can help these toys become reality by clicking here.  


Friday, December 27, 2013

Monster Worship Exclusives Available Now at Foe Gallery



    We have a grocery store nearby that just got this machine that will buy your unwanted gift cards from you.  I'm sure it doesn't give you full value for them because they have to make a little something for themselves, but it's still a good way to get rid of those cards to Aeropostale you'll never use and get cash instead.  Then you could convert that cash into awesome toys instead of crappy shirts with a store's name on them. 

    Personally, I would buy these exclusive Monster Worship toys from Foe Gallery.  They are part of the Mysterium show that is currently on exhibit, but these guys are ready to ship to you right now.  Both are cast in clear red vinyl and extremely limited so get to ordering son!  Pick em up from http://www.shopfoe.com/.

GeekWok from UME Toys Releases Tonight!



    Ahhhh time to get back to work.  I hope you all had a good Christmas and didn't get stuck with lots of socks or pink bunny footie pajamas.  I've thus far managed to get toys every year of my life and I plan on keeping up that level of consistency until I'm dead.  You have to have goals.

    Look at this GeekWok from UME Toys.  Now is he really a geek, or is he one of those hipsters that think if they wear big glasses that people will find them interesting?  Ewoks would have been the perfect hipsters because they were already growing their own food and taking Instagram pictures out in the forrest long before it was cool.  This guy looks legit though, and he's probably the one that designed all their fancy tree houses.  Only 20 of these hand made dudes exist and the go on sale today at 9pm GMT through http://umetoys.bigcartel.com/.

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Epic Christmas Review Time Extravaganza: Sumo Trooper from Kris Dulfer/Kid Ink Industries




    It always surprises me that sumo wrestling wasn't invented here.  We invented Burger King, stretch pants, and the Wing Bowl, which packs 20,000 into a stadium to watch people eat chicken as fast as they can.  Sumo seems like a no brainer.  But, since this is America, if we didn't invent it we sure as hell are gonna improve on it.  How much more awesome would sumo wrestling be if everyone wore Storm Trooper helmets?  That's a trick question because it is a known fact that everything, no matter what it is, is more awesome when Star Wars characters are involved.  Try and find something that's not and I'll make sure to send doctors to your house and declare you legally dead.  

   Kris Dulfer of Kid Ink Industries is doing his civic duty by banging out these Sumo Troopers.  These little resin dudes are insane.  He hooked me up with this one while back and I love it.  I took him outside today for a while to really charge up his special glow feature and that sucker was so bright I'm thinking about throwing my lamps out and just getting a bunch of these.


    Look at that dude shine!  It may be filled with magic, I dunno how these things work.  I'm just a simple toy bloggin bro.  What I do know (see how I just transitioned there?  that's called literature son) is that he just loaded his store up with a bunch of one-offs of these.  There's all kinds of different colors to pick from.  All you gotta do is go to http://kidinkindustries.storenvy.com/, pick one out, and place your order.  

    If you've never owned a hand made toy like this you're really missing out.  There's no factory or heavy machinery involved, you're buying a piece of art directly from the artist.  There's just a different feel about them when you realize the hard work that one lone person did to make this happen.  Kris is a master at his craft and his pieces never cease to blow me away, and they're even better in person.  

Friday, December 20, 2013

Frankenstein's Monster Bust from Plaseebo



    Of course this bust of Frankenstein's Monster from Plaseebo look great on your shelf, but you can also use it to defend yourself during a home invasion.  This is nine inches tall and made of solid resin that weighs in at four pounds.  Now that might now seem like a lot, but smack some fool upside the head with it and you'll only need the cops to show up to remove the body.  Not that this is marketed as a weapon, but I like to try and find the hidden added value.  It's the same technique I use when the wife and I shop for things for the house.  

"In an emergency, could we use this to kill a man?"

Sharon weighs the object in her hand, then stares inquisitively at my head.

"I think it would crack a skull."

End scene.

   Plaseebo only made three of these and they will be released at www.plaseebo.net/webstore/ on Christmas Day.  


Christmas MonstreApes from Monstrehero



    Forget that Elf on the Shelf nonsense, this Christmas it's all about monkeys!  Let's start a new tradition, where if you're a rotten little heathen all year, the Christmas Ape climbs down your chimney instead of Santa and puts a handful of his own homemade coal in your stocking.  But a little poop in your sock isn't going to stop you from being a terrible person right?  Well, after he drops the ol yule log, he brings the stocking to your bedroom and beats you about the head with it.  Maybe that will make those little brats think twice about trying to run down an upwards moving escalator at the mall.  And speaking of escalator safety, don't stop once you get off the escalator and then determine where you want to go.  Move over to the side so other people are able to get off of those death stairs.  I had to push a dude out of the way because he was barely off of the thing and looking around like it took him to some alien world.  

    Back to business.  Ask for Christmas Apes, and ye shall receive.  Monstrehero just loaded some of these festive primates into their store and they're ready to spread the holiday cheer/poop in your stocking.  Look, they're even holding little Christmas ornaments!  And they're pee pee is out.  You're getting the full monkey experience with these dudes.  Get one for yourself or a loved one at http://monstrehero.bigcartel.com/

Thursday, December 19, 2013

Mako Knight from Skinner to Benefit PangeaSeed



    Like all aspects of life, things need to maintain a delicate balance.  And being that people can be greedy morons, this is difficult to achieve.  Healthy oceans are essential to sustaining life on earth, but we regularly pollute them and over fish them in the name of making a buck.  PangeaSeed has teamed up with artists all over the world to help raise money and awareness to protect our world's oceans.  Skinner created this Mako Knight figure a few months back but there are still some available to purchase through http://shop.pangeaseed.org/.  Only 25 were produced and for a mere $60 you get an awesome toy and you're helping make the world a little bit better.  See, and you thought I was just full of jokes.  I can be serious too.  

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Toy Art Gallery Exclusive Jyujin from GEEK! and Medicom Toys



    This dude kinda freaks me out.  I bet if you don't recycle your cans he'll come around to your house punch you in the face.  And then when you come too you'll realize that he's let squirrels move into your kitchen.  Throw your recyclables in the proper receptacle people!!!

    This is Jyujin.  He was created by GEEK!, produced by Medicom, and is an exclusive to Toy Art Gallery.  He goes on sale tomorrow, December 18th, at noon Pacific time from http://shop.toyartgallery.com/.  He stands a full foot tall so you're gonna have to get rid of some of your Nicholas Sparks books to fit him on your shelf.  



Monday, December 16, 2013

Breaking Down the 2013 Neiman Marcus Fantasy Gifts



    Ahhhh it’s that time of year again, where we stress ourselves out to find that perfect present for the ones we love.  What’s that you say?  You haven’t finished your shopping yet?  Well, if you’re in the highest of tax brackets, Neiman Marcus has taken all of the worry out of holiday shopping with their annual Christmas Book.  If you’re not wealthy enough to afford any of this, please join me in figuring out how to weasel our way into Warren Buffet’s will. 





“His and Her’s” Ultimate Outdoor Entertainment System  $1.5 million


    I grew up down south, so I totally get the whole concept of having your nicest furniture out on the lawn.  I also am familiar with watching tv outside, but that wasn’t because we were ultra fancy and throwing garden parties while we watched The Bad Girls Club.  It was because that’s as far as the extension cord would stretch from the neigbor’s outlet.  Sure, we would have liked to have been all cozy in the living room, but when you have to steal your electricity you learn to work around your limitations.  





Bespoke Global Falconry Companion  $150,000


    I don’t get falconry.  Ok, I don’t really even know what it is.  Sure, I could have looked it up, but I might find out I like it and that would make it harder to make fun of.  Stop judging me.

    From what I gather about falconry, you some how obtain a falcon by putting your arm out and then you put a little hat on it to shame him.  This is how rich people pass the time while they talk about rich things like stock portfolios and indoor plumbing.  Basically you get all of the things you see in the picture, except for the girl and the actual falcons.  So do you just set this up in your backyard and wait for the falcons to see it and realize that you know how to party?   Or maybe it comes with a coupon and you have to send away for your falcons like you do sea monkeys.  Maybe they’re all just dude falcons and are attracted by the scent of blonde models.  For this much money I shouldn’t be left with so many questions.  Let’s move on.





Ciclotte $11,000

    Oh, it looks like we’ve reached the clearance section.  I’d be totally down with this giant bicycle wheel if it could actually go somewhere.   Craigslist is full of information on how you can obtain exercise bikes from the side of the road for free, so this sucker needs to be much more compelling if they want my $11,000.  It doesn’t even come with one of those “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up” necklaces that you’re gonna need when you start using this in ways that were unattended, i.e. ways that would actually make it fun.





Forevermark  Ultimate Diamond Experience  $1.85 million


   Yeah, you get a fancy diamond ring that they cut for you all custom like, but the part I was excited about was having dinner in The Tower of London.  I say “was” because in my head the dinner was gonna take place on the block where they seperated Ann Boleyn from her head.  Then I found out that they actually have cafes all throughout the place, taking away any charm that could have been had from eating my chicken nuggets at the site of famous executions.   Jerks.





The Glass House Experience  $30,000

    Ahh, another gift for those of us on a budget.  The gist is you get to hang out with some famous architect.  Lame.  They should let you hang out with the Hell’s Angels and let you get in a bar fight.  Then afterwards you’ll get a prison style tattoo and shank your worst enemy with a homemade knife.  That is by far more exciting than sitting in some dude’s house that is completely see through.  Isn’t that just begging for peeping toms?  Do peeping toms still exist or am I showing my age?





Indian Larry’s “Wild Child” Motorcycle  $750,000

    Oh good Lord in Heaven I want this!  Ok, I know I’ve been kind of a weiner about all the other stuff, but this, my friends, is worth being rich for.  I remember watching him build this sucker on tv and wanting it sooooooooooooo bad.  You win this round Neiman Marcus.





Jeff Koon’s Dom Perignon Balloon Venus $20,000

    The real kick to the pants is that none of that fancy champagne is included, which would no doubt make the sculpture a lot better.  Don’t get me wrong, I love art, but I can’t do anything with this trumped up version of a balloon animal.   You really don’t even get one bottle? 





The Neiman Marcus 2014 Aston Martin Vanquish Volante  $344,500

     Ok, they’ve got two things on this list that I would slap your grandma to own.  Being that my car has more miles on it than an elderly hooker, I wouldn’t mind trading up to the car that even James Bond wants to own.  Plus they all come with machine guns hidden behind the headlights right?   Not that it matters, because this car has a V-12 engine that pumps out enough horsepower to drop panties in a 100 mile radius.  That, my friends, is a true secret weapon.  


Saturday, December 14, 2013

Best Buds Resin Series by Tony Devito for Tenacious Toys Super Series Sunday



    The fact that I'm posting about these toys will probably disqualify me from ever holding public office, which is fine because all politicians are crooks.  If I wanted to be a thief I would just go hold up a 7-11, which would definitely end any future presidential bids.  I can imagine the other candidate and I debating on tv, when the moderator asks if I would like to address the time I wrote about those weed toys on my little internet site.  The audience would gasp and I would be forced to live in seclusion on a reindeer farm in Iceland.  Which actually doesn't sound that bad.  Speaking of Iceland, I bought my wife a necklace with a piece of lava rock from there and it only cost $1.90 to ship it to me and I got it in five days.  I can't even mail something 100 miles away in the United States for that price.  We must learn their secrets.  

    Break out your Doritos and Iron Butterfly records because Tenacious Toys is releasing this Best Buds resin series from Tony Devito and We Are Not Toys tomorrow as part of Super Series Sunday.  There are 15 original figures in this series, each with a gold, silver, and bronze chase color and random golden tickets that can be redeemed for cool stuff.  Get one blind box for $29.99 or guarantee a whole set of 15 plus a mystery figure for $420.  They go on sale tomorrow, December 15th at 6pm Eastern time only at http://www.tenacioustoys.com/.

Friday, December 13, 2013

Blamo Toys 5th Annual Custom Show at Toy Art Gallery




    About this time every year I think the wife and I should pack up the kitties and toys and move.  It's not that I don't like living in the Pine Barrens of New Jersey, it's just that it's cold and snowy.  And it is inevitable that if it snows, I have to go to work.  Which means I have to drive surrounded by people who act like they've never seen snow before and close their eyes praying to get to their destination safely.  It's like real life Mario Kart except if you lose you end up getting scraped off the pavement with a shovel.  But then as soon as I think about moving I also remember that I don't like the heat either, so I just give up and watch tv.  

    California seems like a nice place if I were ever to make a big transition.  The weather is nice and it s the center of the designer toy movement in America.  Case in point: Toy Art Gallery.  We don't have anything remotely like this where I live and I would kill to be able to go to all of their shows.  Tomorrow night is the opening reception for the 5th annual Blamo Toys Custom Show and the list of participating artists just about covers the entire toy world.  Everyone started out with one of those Billy figures you see up there and then completely transformed them into something beyond insane.  If you can see them in person you really should, otherwise just sit back and wait like I am until they're all posted online.  


New Stuff You Probably Need from Frank Kozik



    Being Frank Kozik sounds like an awesome job.  Sure, he's worked hard to get where he's at, but now it must be where all the awesome perks kick in, like makin toys and pettin cats all day.  He's so popular that people are clamoring to put his half rotten head on their shelves to look at every day.  That's when you know you've made it.  If orange is your color of choice then you can "head" (see what I did there?) over to www.frankkozik.net on your Google machine and get one of these limited busts that Kevin Gosselin made.  Tell it your secrets, ask it for advice, or just bring it cheeseburgers every day as an offering.  The crazy possibilities are endless!


    Ok, now where was this when I was getting engaged to my wife?  This could have saved me a ton of cash and the catch phrase on it could have prepared her for the years of being married to me.  I bet this sucker would give you special powers too, kinda like the Green Lantern.  Like, the "power to be locked up in the psych ward for trying to use your special powers on unsuspecting people until they called the police".  Even if it doesn't make you any more super than you already are, it still looks cool, and at the end of the day that's still a win.  This is also available right now on www.frankkozik.net.  

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Limited Edition Cosmopup from Nathan Hamill



    There's a lot of stuff coming out today.  It's like the toy universe is challenging me to write about all of it.  Well, I have to go to work soon but I wanted to squeeze in one more post about these custom Octopups from Nathan Hamill.  He only hand painted 6 of these little dudes and one can be yours when they go on sale today at noon Pacific time at http://www.nathanhamill.bigcartel.com/.  I have to go take a shower now.  Not that you needed to know that.

New Artifacts Releasing Today from Maximum Fluoride



    These are the kinds of things that teenagers find in abandoned cabins in the forest right before they get slaughtered.  Touching one will certainly open a portal to another dimension that is filled with creatures beyond what our human minds can comprehend.  Blood thirsty and hungry for power they will step into our world, devour our souls, and render our WiFi signals unusable.  

    Ok, none of that will probably happen unless either a.) you're house was built on an indian burial ground or b.) you seriously need your meds adjusted.  But I say throw caution to the wind and welcome one of these Artifacts from Maximum Fluoride into your life.  Worst case scenario is you have an awesome conversation piece that will make you feel like Indiana Jones.  Best case is that you become some sort of supreme overlord that rules an army of the undead.  Either way, pick one up when they go on sale at noon today from http://maximumfluoride.bigcartel.com/.

New Holiday Releases from Peter Kato Happening Today



    Christmas is getting dangerously close for you folks that haven't finished your shopping (me).  Since you're reading this, I figure you or someone you know likes toys right?  So why not get them something unique and handmade instead of a pile of socks (send those to me, I can never find any around here).  

    Peter Kato is releasing two new colorways of his popular figures today to help you with your last minute gift needs.  Not only are they toys, but they're original art, made by the man himself in his Brooklyn studio.  Pick em up at http://peterkatoshop.com/.






Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Alderaandie & Sith Resin Stormtroopers from Kid Ink Industries



    Just because you're all the same person underneath your helmets, doesn't mean you can't personalize your wardrobe.  These chill Stormtrooper bros know that no one can tell them apart (cause of the whole clone business) but they still want to express their feelings through fashion!!  Kris Dulfer/Kid Ink Industries just put these up for sale at http://kidinkindustries.storenvy.com/ and they're already starting to sell out, so stop reading my nonsense, click that link, and get yourself something cool.  

Heavy Metal Wookie from I Break Toys



    Of course Chewbacca is a metal fan.  Do you think anything covered in that much hair is not listening to Iron Maiden?  Lisa Rae Hansen/I Break Toys has really outdone herself with this figure, and it's better than anything Star Wars has officially released in the last ten years.  She took an old school action figure and made it better, which is not something that's easy to do with such an iconic character.  If you want one for your collection (you do, I can see it in your eyes) then you better be quick when these go on sale tomorrow, December 12th, at 10pm GMT cause everybody's gonna want one.  And no, they most likely won't let you play with theirs.  


Smells Like X-Mas Smoking Poo Ornaments from Frank Kozik



    Decorating with poop is an old tradition that began with the pagans many moons ago.  Their feeling was that life was already pretty crappy, what with an average life expectancy of 20, so let's throw some turds around the house and see if it wards off evil.  It didn't stop evil as much as it invited parasites, thus cutting their life expectancy to 18.  Hey, this is how scientific breakthroughs happen people.   So while the tradition of decorating with your recycled food has been replaced with indoor plumbing, we can pay tribute to those pioneers with these much safer/less disease ridden substitutes.

    Mr. Frank Kozik is up to his usual shenanigans, this time taking over our Christmas trees with these resin poop ornaments.  His stuff is already in every other place in my house, so this is the logical next step.  Though I do wish he would make Labbit-shaped non slip stickers to put in my tub.  He should propose that to his research and development team.  Safety should not only be important, it should be stylish.

    These smokin' coils are sold as a set for $40 and only 25 sets were made.  Get em now at www.frankkozik.net.  

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Modern Hero Bank in Blue from MAD x Tenacious Toys



    I'm great at saving money.  However, I suck at making money, so there's never really anything to save. It is my curse.  I do however have the hair of a Sears catalog model, so I have that going for me.

    If I had money I would want to keep it in this Modern Hero bank from Mad.  You just lift off his little hat and fill his plastic body with your riches.  I would fill it mostly with rocks and whatever change I find in the parking lot so people thought I was a baller if they tried to pick it up and shake it.  This sucker is huge too, standing a whopping 18 inches high.  And it would be really awesome to walk into the bank carrying this when you have to cash your coins/rocks in.  Tenacious Toys is the exclusive retailer of this blue version and have it up for preorder right now on their website.  They only made 30 of them so act quick sucka and get on the road to successful wealth management.  

Dead Kozik Bust in Green from Kevin Gosselin x Suburban Vinyl





    I would think that it would have to be a weird feeling to have someone make a toy of you as a corpse.  I'm not sure my wife would want a Dead Chris bust, but that might be because I told her I was gonna haunt her if I die first.  Nothing major like Poltergeist or anything, I would just try to keep up the level of annoying stuff that I did while I was alive.  

  Kevin Gosselin has paid tribute to the future insect buffet of Frank Kozik in this limited edition bust.  Suburban Vinyl has got this exclusive green version that is limited to 50 pieces and will cost ya $200.  I think he would look lovely next to grandma's urn.  



Saturday, December 7, 2013

Super Series Sunday from Tenacious Toys featuring Nerviswr3k




    My wife has a stomach made of cast iron.  Some of her favorite food in the world can be purchased from little carts that have the sanitary standards of a rest stop toilet.  

"Oh look honey, there's a man roasting some squirrel in an oil drum, let's check out his prices."

    I say that as a joke because I wouldn't actually point that out to her in case she took me seriously.  Once she ate an unwrapped mint she found in a bag of change just to gross me out.  I didn't kiss her for 6 months.  

    I would imagine she has critters like this living in her digestive system that just obliterate any germs she may ingest.  Spoiled food is like a suburban family driving through the worst part of town as it tries desperately to reprogram it's GPS.  You came to the wrong neighborhood son, and you won't be coming back.

   Nerviswr3k and We Are Not Toys made these hand painted resin critters for tomorrow's Super Series Sunday release from Tenacious Toys.  There are 12 regular figures and some chases thrown in just to make it exciting.  Get one blind box for $35 or a complete set of twelve for $350.  That's two figures free if you buy the set!!!!  They go on sale at 6pm tomorrow (December 8th) only from www.tenacioustoys.com.  

Friday, December 6, 2013

Power Rangers 20 Rangers for 20 Years at Toy Art Gallery



Tado

    Most of the time when I post about custom shows I tell you about the day it starts and then you have a month or so to view it in person.  Not this time.  You literally only have this weekend to see these giant customized Power Rangers as part of their 20th Anniversary.  Twenty different ones will be on display from 20 of your favorite artists and Bandai will have really rare Power Rangers stuff on display for you to drool over.  There will also be a pop up shop featuring tons of stuff for you to buy, including a few limited tees from Mishka.  And you can of course buy the custom toys if you like.  This all takes place at Toy Art Gallery in LA and the opening reception is tomorrow night from 7-10pm.  


Olek



Lamour Supreme

Thursday, December 5, 2013

New Stuff from Cop A Squat Toys



    One of the things that's interesting about toy collecting is seeing what strange things become insanely popular.  Like those crazy Japanese toys that look like burn victims with contorted faces.  I never would have picked those as being something that people would fight over, let alone for $800 plus.  But people love em, even if they can't necessarily afford them.  Cop A Squat Toys was inspired by those figures when they created this NapNapNap resin dude.  This sucker glows in the dark and has a hand painted insert mapping out his circulatory system.  Only 15 of these 5.5 inch tall figures were made at the much more affordable price of $65.  You can pick one up this Saturday, December 7th, at 3pm Eastern time.  



    If you've got the toy itch right now and can't wait any longer to buy something, then you can order one of these Semi Korosiyas.  Thirteen were made and will run you $70 each.  Both figures will only be available from http://copasquattoys.bigcartel.com/.




Giant Monsters Total Combat! Solo Show from Jeff Lamm at Rivet Gallery



    Giant Monsters Total Combat! is the greatest name for an art show in the history of the world.  None of those bums that the ninja turtles were named after came up with anything that awesome.  Nope, that honor goes to Jeff Lamm for his solo show this Saturday at Rivet Gallery.  And of course the man that is famous for making monster toys is gonna have a few new releases to keep ya happy.  There will be a special edition Greasebat and Friends Gummi Playset as well as this beauty that Unbox Industries posted on their Instagram account:  


    Oooooooh, sparkly!  The opening reception will be from 7-10pm where you can meet Jeff and buy lots of cool stuff for me for Christmas.  Or your other friends, that's cool too.  

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Andrew Bell x Ferg Misfortune Cat



    I love cats, I really do, but my house is at capacity.  Don't ask me to take your kittens,  don't ask me to house sit your well-behaved leopard, don't ask me to watch those SPCA commercials that make me feel like a horrible person.  We have 5 of our own little buggers and last night was the first time that really hit me.  Mostly because it was the first time they had all been gathered together, waiting for us to feed them canned food (its a treat, dry food is where it's at).  They all sat still, side by side as my wife opened the lid, and when I walked into the kitchen I almost passed out.  We're now officially crazy cat people.

    The moral of the story is that the only other cats that will come into this house will be of the plastic variety, like this Misfortune Cat from Andrew Bell and Ferg.  For $54.95 you can get this 5 inch tall kitty all decked out like a crazy demonic deity, whose favorite way to torment humans is to shove a sword through his head while he does his famous Gene Simmons impression.  Talk about an awkward guest at your next dinner party.  

    "He can't help it Frank, it's how he torments your eternal soul.  Do you want some more green bean casserole?"

     This bad kitty is available for preorder now wherever you like to buy toys.  

Yeti Dunny from Pause Designs x Kidrobot Releases Tomorrow



    And now for something completely different.  By you seeing this picture, you have officially seen more yeti than any of those stupid tv shows that try to hunt them down.  How is that even enjoyable to watch?  Oh look, some hillbillies are gonna throw snack food all over the forest, then sit around and get excited at every single noise they hear.  "Did you hear that?  Let's run really fast and make the camera all jumpy, find nothing, then go on and on about how we just missed it."  Repeat this 13 times and you have an entire season of television.  

    Pause Designs made a custom yeti for a client a few years back where they flipped a Dunny over, glued his arms to his feet, and made a terrifying snow critter.  Kidrobot liked it so much that they actually put it in to production and you can buy one tomorrow.  It's a weird design to say the least, and it's taken me some time to wrap my head around.  I applaud them for taking such a risk with their iconic Dunny platform, and I applaud them even further for making this one more affordable at $59.99.  They've been more willing to push the boundaries with sculpted details before, but this is the first time that the original figure is almost unrecognizable.  It makes me excited to see what they will do next.  

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Totims from Tim Clarke x Toy Art Gallery



    Sharon and I recently started rewatching that show Millennium that was on in the '90's with Lance Henriksen and last night we took it too far.  It was like that episode of Portlandia, when they marathoned Battlestar Galactica and then everyone lost their jobs cause they couldn't stop watching it.  Before we knew it the clock struck 1 am and I felt like death.  Normally, I'm pretty coherent until about 11:30, then my body decides it has had enough and starts to shut down.  I forget how to speak english, I start that weird half awake/half asleep dreaming, and the stairs to the second floor become an insurmountable obstacle not unlike Mt. Everest.  But the show is soooooooooooo good.  The moral of the story is that this looks like something that Frank Black (who is played by the aforementioned Mr. Henriksen) would find at a crime scene and lead him to the ultimate psychological battle with a serial murderer.  

    This is a Totim and it was created by Tim Clarke.  If you grew up when I did you know Tim's work, cause this dude made some killer toys, like Boglins, and even worked for Jim Henson making all kinds of critters you would instantly recognize.  He and Toy Art Gallery put their heads together to produce this interchangeable toy that lets you reorganize the parts to suit your mood.  Each piece is double sided so you have a bunch of possibilities when it comes to how it looks.  This pink edition goes on sale Tomorrow, December 4th, at noon Pacific time at http://shop.toyartgallery.com/.

Monday, December 2, 2013

Game of Thrones Series 3 Pop! Vinyls from Funko




    On this day known as Cyber Monday let us think back to a simpler time, before the internet, or people being punched in the face over cheap dish towels.  Let us think back to the time so accurately portrayed in Game of Thrones, where an argument was decided by a sword and having children with your sister was no big deal.  Hold on a sec.  I'm being told that Game of Thrones is not actually a dramatic recreation of American history.  You're kidding right?  I know they didn't get to the whole George Washington part yet, but it I was sure it was coming.  I just assumed it was all real, what with the History Channel not actually airing anything of historical value anymore I thought HBO had picked up the slack and was gonna teach me something.  Obviously the place beyond the wall is Canada; we can all agree on that right?  

    Ok, I didn't really believe Game of Thrones was real, but I kind of wish it was.  Except for that whole 8 year winter thing, which seems kind of crappy.  Could you imagine if we really had to be completely bundled up for that long?  We would all look like those cave creatures who have that see-through skin.  You'd make a mint if you owned a tanning salon.  

    I'm finding it hard to stay on track today, so much so that I just wrote about how hard I'm finding it to stay on track.  Sure I could have deleted that part, but this way it's a more authentic experience for you, the reader.  We're on this magical journey together my friends, and there are gonna be some bumps in the road.

    So Funko has some pretty sweet new Game of Thrones Pop! Vinyl figures coming out in January.  Except for the Daenerys Targaryen, who will be released in February.  Why?  I dunno, just cause that's what they felt like doing.  I ain't mad about it.