Used Sketty 8 Inch Dunny from Sket-One

    

       Peanut butter is my jam (see what I did there) but I really only like the chunky version.  I've got this weird texture issue with food that's too soft, so those extra bits of peanuts hidden throughout are there to save me from utter disgust.  I also prefer lumpy mashed potatoes, french fries that are well done on the outside, and bread that has a crust that could undo the best dental work.  Please don't send me any food though, because I have another weird issue about people trying to feed me.  This is getting way too personal.

    I won't hold it against Sket-One that his latest Dunny is lacking the crunchy bits I love, but only because this toy is completely not edible.  And to top it all off someone has been mighty liberal in their use of this lunch time staple, as most of it's contents are long gone.  That's ok though, because like I said before you won't be making sandwiches with this toy; you'll only be making other collectors jealous at your awesome score.  

    Each eight inch figure comes with a mini jar of peanut butter, a slice of bread, and a knife with a little bit of the good stuff still attached to the end.  You can preorder yourself one starting tomorrow ( Friday, September 1st) at 12am eastern time for a period of 24 hours.  Once that day is up, the window for purchase will be closed and the manufacturing will commence.  These are only available from http://sketone.storenvy.com.

The Heck Resin Figure from We Become Monsters

    Why is it that doctors have all the worst art in their offices?  You'd think they'd be able to afford something really nice, but everything looks like it belongs at a thrift store.  I get that you can't put anything crazy like a Hieronymus Bosch in the waiting room of your dentist's office (though Ive been to a dentist where that would have fit right in with his bedside manner) but you can certainly do better.  All this brings me to a painting hanging in the office of my doctor.  It depicts a man standing behind a basket that is filled with severed heads.  The basket is cleverly labeled "new heads" in case there was any question of what it contained, and is in theory supposed to represent how great it would be if you had an issue with your own mind to just swap it with a spare.  I personally read it as the young man that created the painting is in no subtle way trying to tell you about his love for dismembering human bodies and what would be found beneath the floor boards of his kitchen should you be curious.  His confessional looks like it was created by a fifth grader, which adds the unease I feel every time I look at it.  The only time I think a boring painting by Monet would be a bit more appropriate is if it is replacing one given to you by the criminally insane. 

    Having multiple heads lying around isn't always a bad thing, even if they do come knocking on your door with a search warrant.  Case in point, this new creation from We Become Monsters.  It's called The Heck, and is a scaled down version of one of his other figures, The Hell.  There are three different colors of this four inch figure to collect, and each comes with an alternate head for mixing and matching how you see fit.  Available exclusively from http://webecomemonsters.storenvy.com, these suckers are hand made and extremely limited.   

Resin Cthulhu Madball from Magitarius

    

    Even The Old Ones recognize how important a game of catch is to help a father bond with his son. Plus, the development of hand eye coordination is really important if one day you are to return to this world and decimate mankind.  Hence we have this Cthulhu Madball from the resin slinging folks at Magitarius.  Limited to just five pieces in this color scheme, each one will prepare your throwing arm in no time for that all important moment when you rise from the sea and take back what is rightfully yours.  Pick one up now over at http://www.magitarius.com.

Technicolor Owl Clam Lottery from Nathan Jurevicius x Toy Art Gallery

   We've all been there: you're wandering around a music festival in the summer heat.  Your body is having an adverse reaction to stomach medication that unbeknownst to you requires you to stay out of direct sunlight.  Your wife goes to the bathroom and when she returns you're not there as you've been helped to the medical tent suffering from weakness and hallucinations.  Just when all hope seems lost, The Great Owl Clam appears to you.  Armed with an ice pack and a soothing voice like Jim Morrison,  he ensures that everything will not only be ok, but they will be awesome.  After you go to the emergency room though.

    A few days after.

     It's still embarrassing.

   Follow the technicolor dream boat that is the Owl Clam to find your own inner peace.  Sprung forth from the mind of Nathan Jurevicius and produced by Toy Art Gallery, this wonder of Japanese plastic can be yours by entering a lottery to purchase.  From now until Monday at noon pacific time, you can send an email to sales(at)toyartgallery.com with "Owl Clam Lottery" as the subject.  Please include your Paypal address and shipping info as well, and only enter once.  God speed.


    

Preorder Skinner's Necronomicon Pop Up Book from Poposition Press

    You may have read everything that H.P. Lovecraft ever committed to paper, but you've never had his stories literally jump off the page to drag your soul into unescapable madness!!!!!  Now you can experience these tales like it was the first time with this Necronomicon Pop Up book from Skinner and Poposition Press.  Featuring five stories of terror to keep you up at night and probably pee a little, this book goes beyond anything the master of horror could have envisioned himself.  Available for preorder now at a special discounted price and in three different versions for collectors, no home would be complete without one.  Get all the details and secure one for yourself by visiting 

https://www.necronomiconpopup.com.  

The Talking Board 5 Inch Dunny from Doktor A x Kidrobot

    The five inch Dunny platform is quickly becoming my favorite.  Not only is the size perfect for those of us that are running out of shelf space, but the designs Kidrobot has showcased on it have pushed the boundaries of where the toy can go.  The latest is the Talking Board from Doktor A.  Based on a custom he did many moons ago, this is one of those toys you have to hold in your hands to really appreciate the intricacies of both the design and the finished product.  Luckily, I have had one for a few days now so I'm telling you this based on my own first hand experience.  He fits in beautifully with my cabinet of curiosities and is right now the only toy I have in there amidst the bones and quack medical devices.  Just look how happy he is posed next to a donation card from the Body Worlds exhibit:

    You can get your own and use it to contact the spirit realm when he goes on sale this Friday, August 25th.  The red edition will be available wherever you like to buy your designer toys, while the green version is an exclusive to www.kidrobot.com.  

The Debut of James Groman's Brachiosaurus from Toy Art Gallery

    If zombie dinosaurs roamed the Earth, would they have still been around until we invented ways to kill them?  This is the pressing question of our times, or at least this very moment as we gaze upon the debut of this Brachiosaurus from James Groman x Toy Art Gallery.  Of course, it is possible that the zombie dinosaurs would have wiped us out before we had the chance to realize that you have to hit them in their pea sized brains for it to be effective.  Now I'm freaking out about zombies evolving to have tiny heads thus making them nearly immortal.  I need to start going to bed earlier.

    Cast in a beautiful red vinyl, this eight inch tall lizard features five points of articulation, which would be just enough to not be able to do a damn thing about a giant meteor.  Available starting today (Friday, August 18) at noon pacific time, he can be yours for $125 only from www.toyartgallery.com. 

Long Night Edition Luna from The Bots x UVD Toys

    Thank God people weren't toting around cell phones with cameras when I was going through my goth phase.  Plausible deniability is much easier when no photographic evidence exists, and me telling you about it is way less horrifying than seeing it for yourself.  Thankfully I moved past that time in my life well before middle age hit, because looking like Robert Smith from The Cure is not even a good look for Robert Smith.

    Luna is channeling her dark side in this exclusive colorway from The Bots and UVD Toys.  Limited to just 75 pieces, $60 will not only get you the toy but also a matching enamel pin.  Procure yourself one at http://uvdtoys.storenvy.com.

Help Luke Chueh Turn His Art Into Animation

    Believe it or not I almost made a cartoon once.  My wife and I were working with this local dude who had a production company and we came up with ideas for something that would have been pretty awesome.  "Would have" because the dude flaked out on us and stole most of our ideas to use in another one of his projects, which actually aired.  I would be mad about it, but his life turned out to be pretty crappy afterwards so I feel like that's the universe having our back on that one.  Karma is way cheaper than trying to hire an attorney.

    Luke Chueh has dreams of turning his famous characters into an animation and he is on the cusp of it happening.  As of this writing his Grief Encounters project is 97% funded, so now it's up to all of you to give it that final push.  There are only a few days left but tons of great rewards still to be had, like the above 1000% resin Possessed statue.  Or if that's a little rich for your blood there are smaller versions in vinyl to be had that are exclusive to the campaign:

    Munky King also has versions of his Hung and Prisoner figures that are dying to hop in a shipping box and be mailed to you as soon as you pledge your support.  Check out this link and let's help make it happen.

      

Satanic Spaceman Glampyre Lottery from Martin Ontiveros x Toy Art Gallery

    So let me get this straight:  you have a chance to not only own one of these sweet Glampyre toys, but they've been hand painted by the man behind the design, Martin Ontiveros?  And this eight inch figure looking like Dracula joined the Kiss Army is only $150?  I may not hit the Powerball, but this is the next best thing.  You would wish I did hit a jackpot like that, because I would quit my job in such awesome fashion it would absolutely break the Internet.  I've already got it all planned out, so keep me in your prayers.

   Speaking of lotteries, the only way you can own one of these limited edition dream boats is by entering one.  From now until Monday, August 14 at noon pacific you can email sales@toyartgallery.com with the subject line "Glampyre Lottery" along with your PayPal details and shipping address. Then cross whatever you can for good luck so you bring this beauty home.

Death Goliathon Lottery from Planet-X Asia x Cop a Squat Toys

    Jane Goodall never hung out with monkeys that looked like this.  All of her primate buds had only one head and certainly didn't look like they took radiation baths every morning. You will not find him in any zoo, placing his paw against the glass in an effort to connect with visitors on some deeper level.  Nope, this is a freakish Planet of the Apes-style secret military monkey whose only interest in you is using your bones to pick his teeth.  He is full of pretty colors, though.  

    Planet -X Asia has enlisted the help of Cop a Squat Toys to paint up a limited run of only 6 of these bad monkeys.  The things are freakin huge so you might want to go to Home Depot and reinforce your shelves before you enter the lottery to purchase one.  Here are the details if you want in on this behemoth:

    All you must do to enter the lottery is be a @copasquattoys follower on Instagram and comment “I’m in!” on the photo 

    Price will be $300 + shipping via USPS Priority.  The winners will be drawn on Friday. August 11th.

Blue Draculobster from Michael Skattum

       I was totally gonna write about this season of Game of Thrones but I don't want to be the dude that spoils it for those that haven't watched any episodes yet.  I'd be pretty heated if someone ruined it for me so I'll refrain from wondering too much about how slowly the army of the dead is moving in their attempt to get beyond the wall.  It's not like a kid who doesn't have the use of his legs totally got to where he was going and had time to rest up and spit prophesies.  I bet the undead formed a union and now they have to take regularly scheduled breaks.  Or maybe their bladders have all shriveled and they have to stop to pee constantly like that one time at New York Comic Con where I was trying to pass a kidney stone and I had to go every 10 minutes.  If you're ever peeing blood the most awesome thing you can do is not flush the toilet so the guy after you has something fun to talk about with his friends.        

    This Blue Draculobster from Michael Skattum (aka Draculazer) and Gums Productions totally reminds me of one of those White Walkers.  Except for the lobster claw and his utter disregard for clothing.  You can bring this ten inch vinyl toy home today for only $85 which includes shipping from Honk Kong, which is where giant lobster people live.  Snag one at http://www.michaelskattum.com before they sell out.


     

Resin Reptillian Madball from Magitarius

      When I was studying forensics in college one of my textbooks had a picture of a dude who had taken copious amounts of illegal substances, sliced his entire face off with broken pieces of glass, and fed his fleshy bits to his dogs.  While the picture was pretty horrifying, the real victims were his puppies who now have an unrealistic expectation of what treat time should look like.  Good luck trying to appease them with a Milk Bone after that.  

    Sometimes when you tear your face off the results are way more neat-o than some basic muscle and bone; sometimes you reveal yourself to be a reptilian overlord.  The folks at Magitarius will make you wonder what your friends are made of with this resin Madball-style release.  Limited to nine pieces, this accurate depiction of the people that run our country are available right now for $55 each (shipping included) by checking out http://www.magitarius.com. 

The Odd Ones: Shard Dunny from Scott Tolleson

 
     You probably thought that The Odd Ones were finished; that the brood of misfits couldn't possibly have any other friends you had yet to meet.  Well, you just got ZINGED!, or whatever it is the kids are saying these days for when you were tricked right out of your shirt, cause looky what we have here.  His name is Shard and he looks to me like a perfect bit of sea glass that washed up on the beach.  Or that blue stuff that the chemistry teacher was making to pay for his cancer treatments in that one show.  Scott Tolleson is there anything you'd like to tell us?  We won't snitch.

     This three inch resin Dunny first made his debut at San Diego Comic Con but now he is available for the rest of the world starting tomorrow (Thursday, August 3rd) at 10 am pacific time.  You'll find him at http://www.stolleart.com/store/ for $50 each plus $10 shipping.

The Lord of the Rings: Mini Epics Vinyl Figures from Weta Workshop

     I remember when my wife took me to watch the first Lord of the Rings film at the theater and afterwards she asked me what I thought about it.  The first thing I could think to say after seeing the books come to life on screen were "I wish we lived in Middle Earth."  I still stand by that sentiment, even though we technically do, as Middle Earth was based on Midgard from Norse Mythology, which is the world of man.  But I want it as it looked in the films: endless breathtaking scenery filled with magic and adventure.  My biggest adventures now are trying to figure how to pay my student loans and not starve to death like the government seems intent on, and trying to figure out why Instagram keeps crashing on my iPad.  Sigh.  

     Everyone out there knows that whenever Weta Workshop is involved in a film that everything they touch will be a highlight, and there collectibles are some of the most impressive I've ever been able to see in person.  Now they're expanding their horizons into the world of vinyl toys and I couldn't be happier.  Each of the first five figures from their new Mini Epics line offers a stylized take on classic characters from The Lord of the Rings.  Choose from Gimli, Frodo, Gollum, a Uruk-Hai Berserker, and a Moria Orc, or just get them all and start your new obsession off properly.  All five are available for preorder now at http://wetaworkshop.com

My Pet Monster Vinyl Toy Preorder from Creepy Co

    When I was little I really wanted a pet tiger.  No real particular reason, I just though having a giant cat living in the house would be cool.  Now that I have five normal sized cats I realize what a nightmare that would have been.  Feeding the thing would bankrupt me and cleaning a litter box that something that those little guys use gets bad enough at times; I would need a snow shovel and a back brace to scoop a tiger's litter.  The beauty of wanting stuff as a kid is that practicality never really comes into play.

    My Pet Monster was the everything a kid could ask for:  you could hang out all day with a supernatural creature and you never had worry about it puking up a hairball on your pillow.  You can know relive all of those great childhood memories with this vinyl version from Creepy Co.  Available now for preorder, this 6 inch tall vinyl figure comes in the classic version (limited to 500) and a shackles version (limited to 100).  Hitchhike down the nostalgia highway by visiting https://www.creepycompany.com.