Warrior from the Jade Galaxy from Unbox Industries

    Thirty years from now when some Hollywood studio decides to remake the Alien vs. Predator film, these four figures would be a great jumping off point for the story.  Imagine some Indiana Jones type walking through a night market in Taiwan.  He walks past the stands and people selling their wares, yet he sees none of it.  Something pulls at him with unseen hands, guiding him through the throngs of shoppers.  And then he sees it: a heavily laquered cherry wood box, ornately detailed with gold inlay.  He reaches down and unlatches it, revealing four grotesque jade figures unlike anything he has ever seen.  He picks one up to admire it and the way the moonlight fills it's every detail has left him in a near trance.  It isn't until the stall owner speaks that he is able to break his gaze:

  "For a price, I can take you to where I found them."


     Then some stuff happens, everyone dies, blah blah blah.  You get the gist.

    I'm not saying these are the greatest Alien and Predator toys of all time, but they've certainly set the proverbial bar a tad high for anyone after.  Created by artist Tik Ka From East and produced by the wizards at Unbox Industries, each figure is hand painted to look like actual jade.  The effect is so realistic they look closer to the stone that inspired them rather than the vinyl they're made of.  You can preorder them right now at http://store.unboxindustries.info/ for $255 a set.

Acid Green 18 Inch Aliens Warrior from Super7

    Halloween isn't just about turning your lights off and pretending not to be home to prevent freeloaders from taking all of your snacks.   Nope, it's also about treating yourself to some new toys to make you forget about your seasonal depression and the ball of snot that has lodged itself in your head until spring.  Super7 is making it look a whole lot more like Christmas with this Acid Green Alien Warrior figure.  Standing 18 inches tall, this plastic beast will be going on sale Halloween day through www.super7store.com and their retail locations.   Tell the neighborhood kids to get jobs and buy yourself this instead of candy.  

    

Celebrate Alien Day With Blind Boxed ReAction Figures from Super7

    There's no better way to celebrate something than with new toys.  Whether it's a promotion at work, the birth of a child, or not stabbing someone in the face who was practically begging to be stabbed in the face, you should always mark momentous occasions by treating yourself to something nice.  Since today is Alien Day(the post office still delivers mail today, right?) there's no better way to  have a good time than with some blind box Xenomorphs from Super7.  These ReAction figures come in one of three different colors that will totally be a surprise until you rip open the packaging to see what you've got.  These are available at all Super7 retail locations and will be online starting at non pacific time today at www.super7store.com.  

    On a side note, did you see Kenny Powers is gonna be in the new Alien movie?  I know it's the guy that plays Kenny Powers, but I'm just thinking how amazing a crossover that would have been.  Ideas like this make me wonder why I'm not allowed to make big decisions.  

    

Aliens Warrior Classic Toy Edition from Super7

    On the tail of the trailer for the brand new Alien film and just a few weeks after debuting at Toy Fair, Super7 is making this big ol figure available for preorder.  I've racked my brain trying to think of something funny to say but I'm drawing a blank.  Have I lost my touch?  Is it time to start writing about high school football for the local newspaper?  Will we ever prove that Ted Cruz is in fact The Zodiac Killer?  The future looks cloudy, but if you want to own this eighteen inch behemoth of a toy you can do so by visiting www.super7store.com.  He'll set you back $195, but if money is truly the root of all evil you should be trying to rid yourself of it anyway.  After you buy one of these send me the rest of your tainted cash and I will dispose of it so it can't hurt anyone ever again.

"Sinister Sandstorm" Alien from Super7

    Did you stay up late last night, drink yourself silly, and watch the ball in Times Square drop as it ushered in the new year?  I can't say that I made it past 10:30 as I dozed off while watching Netflix.  I celebrated the end of 2015 like a boss!  And I refuse to celebrate the beginning of 2016 just yet, cause what if it sucks and I already was really awesome to it then I'll feel like I've been had?  You're not tricking me 2016, I'll celebrate you when you prove yourself!

    If you've been collecting these Alien soft vinyl figures from Super7 then 2016 is off to a great start for you, cause they just released this Sinister Sandstorm version.  Pick one up for yourself at www.super7store.com and set the tone for how this year is gonna go.

"Green Slime" Sofubi Alien from Super7 x Secret Base

    I have yet to learn my lesson about staying off of social media during holidays.  A few days ago was St.Patrick's Day and Facebook was flooded with either pictures of leprechauns or people drinking.  Essentially, it was boring.  The only thing good that can come of it will be when everyone posts all the stupid stuff they did while extremely intoxicated.  Hopefully I'll get to read a good story or two, whether they admit to it themselves or I see it in the news.

    The only redeeming part of St. Patrick's Day for me is that everything is green, which just so happens to be my favorite color.  Not that you would necessarily know that by looking at what I wear or the stuff I own, but it was always a favorite when I was a kid so I'm sticking with it.  Which Is why I'm going to go a head and declare this "Green Slime" Alien figure the best one yet.  I don't know how Super7 and Secret Base are gonna top this see through green vinyl figure accented by a very nice black paint rub, but that doesn't mean they won't try.  These beauties go on sale Friday,  March 20th at noon pacific time from www.super7store.com.  

Super7 x Secret Base Soft Vinyl Alien Pre-Order

    These vinyl Alien figures have been nearly impossible to get and have left a lot of people with no alternative other than to bang their heads into a wall until the part of their brain that wanted one to begin with is bruised into forgetting.  Trust me, it's far less painful than seeing everyone you follow on Instagram post pictures of all the fun things they're doing with their Aliens, while you sit at home nurturing that growing void in your heart.  Stop your bellyaching cause Super7 and Secret Base are making everything ok with this open edition figure.  What that means for you is that you have from tomorrow until November 30th to preorder this glow in the dark bro.  They will be made to order so everyone who wants one will get one.  No more paying ridiculous eBay prices or having to patch forehead size holes in your living room.  

http://super7store.com/

Super7 Exclusives for SDCC 2014

    There's only one reason to go to San Diego Comic Con and it's not waiting in line for days to see a panel or that unique odor of 100,000 people crammed in one place during the Southern California summer.  It's for the crazy toys that companies produce just for this event that will never see the shelf of a toy store.  Super7 unveiled their exclusives for this year and I would punch your grandmother in the mouth to own them.  First up, check out that sweet Alien egg.  You's think that would be enough by itself, but it opens up to reveal a special uber rare figure.  These are sold blind boxed for $25 and you can only buy 4 of them, so hopefully you've paid tribute to the plastic gods and they will smile upon you with what's inside.  

    So now you've got your armful of Alien eggs and nowhere to put them.  If only they created a sweet playset where they could be nurtured and then hatched into little evil space demons.  Oh, would you look at that.  Look how much fun those kids are having, turning every human in the galaxy into a walking incubator.  There are only going to be 250 of these made and are strictly limited to one per person.  

    Girl, I got something real important to give you.  It's a gimp in a box!  But it's not just any gimp, its that pleather-clad weirdo from Pulp Fiction that has probably made you uncomfortable since you first saw him.  Well, now you can have your very own Gimp ReAction figure in a little wooden crate.  Limited again to only one per person, this naughty little monkey can be yours for $25.

    Oh good Lord this is a lot of vinyl!  Alright, I'm a bit overwhelmed so lets just handle these guys in list form so you can have all the pertinent details at your disposal:

Caveman Dinosaur- $35

Mongolian - $65

Crystal Mecha - $95

Fossila - $95

Mummy Boy Adventure Set - $65

Honoo- $35

     I think there's gonna be more stuff too but my head is spinning and I should probably lay down before I fall over on a cat.  Get all this stuff at booth #4945 or get yourself one of those toy mules.  But be specific that it's not necessary to bring the toys back the same way they would, say, something illegal.  Things could get messy.