Super7 x Funko Horror Film ReAction Figures

    I would imagine the thing most people say when they see these figures for the first time is "where were these when I was a kid", but let's be real, there's no way your parents would have bought you a bunch of fictional mass murders to play with.  Unless they really wanted to spend their retirement coming to visit you at the state penitentiary.  But now that you're an adult most people probably already know that you're a weirdo and your parents can rest assured that they got you this far amd the fact that you eat your oatmeal from a human skull certainly can't be a result of how you were raised.  

    Make up for the lost time you could have spent tormenting your other toys with these horror series ReAction figures from Funko and Super 7.  Think of the adventures G.I. Joe missed out on!  Get em all when they're released next month for $9.99 each.  

Jason Voorhees Bishoujo Statue from Kotobukiya

    If Jason Voorhees really looked like this, no guy would mind that she was out murdering campers for fun.  And you could totally overlook the fact that she wanted to keep her mother's rotting head in the garage out back.  As long as she didn't kill you and she at least wiped most of the gore off of her before turning in for the night.  Because as a man, you can justify a lot of bad behavior in a woman as long as she's hot.  I'm not saying it's right, I'm merely providing a commentary on the state of the human race.  

    Kotobukiya has just released these photos of their Bishoujo-inspired homage to Camp Crystal Lake's most notorious drowning victim/supernatural revenge killer and the results are pretty stunning.  She's not slated for release until November, but that gives you time to save your monies.   

Friday the 13th Tees and Toy Giveaway from Playful Gorilla

    Toy Viking fact of the day:  Friday the 13th is my favorite horror movie series.  It's got the right amount of camp (pun intended) and a really cool bad guy with series mommy issues.  What's not to like?  And he rids the world of annoying teenagers.  If Jason really wanted to do us a solid he'd bail on that run down camp site and hang out at the mall.  

    You see that custom toy up there?  I know you want it, cause I want it and I'm full of good ideas.  The only way you can get it is to order one or both of these tees from Playful Gorilla:

    My favorite one is the Bloody Hell version, but that's cause I'm a sociopath (I'm kidding...or am I?).  The 8 Bit Nightmare one is cool too though, as it and the figure are based on the classically-terrible NES game.  And you wanna talk about a range of sizes:  you can get these from onesies (for babies ya weirdo) all the way up to 5XL.  And you get a free sticker.  And the shirts are $20 each or both of them for $36 with free shipping in the US.  And each tee you buy gives you one entry to win the figure.  And they go on sale this Friday, which just happens to be the 13th.

http://playfulgorilla.storenvy.com/

Horror Classics Mystery Minis from Funko

    Only Funko could turn the film world's most frightening characters into something that is almost cute.  I would like to point out that they did forget about the scariest movie I've ever seen.  I don't blame them for missing it, because there really wasn't any blood or gore, but this film has psychologically damaged me from the moment I saw it:

    I'm pretty sure this movie has rendered me unable to have kids.  Who knew that teenagers were so horrific?  I would spend many nights at Camp Crystal Lake with Jason trying to murder me before I would be inclined to try and raise teenage girls.   They're scary.  

    Back to the task at hand.   You know you want them all.  They will be released August 15th in blind box form wherever you prefer to buy your toys.  

SDCC Exclusive Video Game Jason Voorhees from NECA

    I was so jealous when my neighbor got the Friday the 13th video game for the original Nintendo.  He was a smug little punk, but i wanted to play it so bad because I loved the movies as a kid, so I graciously invited myself over to play it.  My jealousy quickly turned to embarrassment for him, because that gamed sucked so bad.  No matter where you went or what you did, Jason was bound to kill you.  So in a lot of ways it stayed true to the films, but it was frustrating beyond belief.  You enter a cabin: JASON.  You walk along the lake: JASON.  And why was he purple?  Was he going through a weird phase like those little kids you see at the mall wearing a Spider Man costume?  

    This figure from NECA has to be the only good thing that has ever resulted from this horrible game's existence.  This purple, glow in the dark Jason is an exclusive to San Diego Comic Con and without a doubt the highlight of the show.  They even packaged it in a replica of the original game box, complete with some of the awful graphics.  It's so campy that it is a definite win on every front.  Buy one for yourself at booth # 3145 or beg anyone you know that's going to get you one.