"Center for the Performing Arts" Building Set from Citizen Brick

    Law school is expensive, and what's a girl to do when she wants to be a district attorney and the student loans just aren't covering it?  Citizen Brick is known for making the building block sets that a certain company would never even dream of creating.  Now you can make it rain on little plastic strippers without ever leaving the privacy of your own home!  Usually that costs a lot of money and you have to burn the pants you wear after you sober up and/or see the performer of your lap dance in natural lighting.  There's a reason these places are dark.  

    Impress your friends and forgo the feeling of needing a hazmat shower with your very own Center for the Performing Arts.  This thing is beyond amazing:  it comes with four exclusive figures, working led lights with batteries, and is made using the same techniques that the big guys use, so this thing is completely legit.  For $275 think of the endless fun you will have without having to worry about the strength of your immune system.  Seriously, have you ever been in a strip club that didn't resemble a third world country? Order yours now and it will ship out Black Friday.  

http://citizenbrick.com/

    

Ultra Time Suck of the Week: The Hobbit Lego Game

    I need to go to full on Lego video game detox.  These games are like visual crack.  I beat the story of the game in no time and all would have been well and good but then my obsessive side kicks in and I am determined to get every little thing in the game and finish it at 100%.  I'll promise myself I'm only gonna play for a half an hour when I get up and the next thing I know is it gets dark again and my wife comes home to find me sitting on the couch, eyes blood shot, and muttering about how I just need to play a little longer to get the blacksmith plans to make the mithril fireworks bow to give to the elf so 

he'll give me the red brick that gives me twice as many studs that I can then turn around to spend on new characters that I will never play as but I need them to fill the blank spaces on my roster.  Send help.  

Lego Batman 3: Beyond Gotham Trailer

I'd like to sum up how I feel about this with one picture:

Dragon Sword Fighter Force from Citizen Brick

    You know what's awesome about Citizen Brick?  They know what the people want.  Let's be realistic for a second, cause as much as we would all go absolutely ape over it, Lego is not gonna make these.  The show that these are based on is waaaaaaaay too out there with it's content for officially licensed sets to ever happen.  So Citizen Brick takes it upon themselves to ensure collectors can have what they want.  i think they're more like finely crafted little pieces of art myself, but I would probably still want to play with them.  There are 12 figures in total that you can either buy as 4 individual sets of 3, or you can get all 12 and a bonus 13th figure (seen below).  These are professionally made too, with big machines and whatnot, so the quality is as good if not better than the ones you buy at the store.  Get em right now at http://citizenbrick.myshopify.com/.

The Simpsons x Lego

    When I see new licensed sets from Lego I always get excited.  Not necessarily for the set itself, but for the other possible things that they should make.  This Simpsons house is cool and all, but I have a list of things I would love to build.  These are in no particular order:

    Sons of Anarchy, Clash of the Titans (the original of course, not that dumb remake), Breaking Bad, He-Man, Game of Thrones, American Horror Story, the Winchester Mystery House, Graceland, Coney Island, 1980's Time Square, Dr. Dre and Snoop Dog rollin in a 6-4, The Dukes of Hazard, etc. etc.  

    So if anyone from Lego is reading this, that is my wish list.  For everyone else, The Simpsons house will release in February.  

Albuquerque Action Squad from Citizen Brick

    Citizen Brick makes all the cool things you want really badly but you know that Lego will never actually make.  You may have seen that cool RV meth lab that they put out last year that caused quite a stir and sold out almost immediately.  Well, now you can add some more characters from the show it was based on to your collection with this Albuquerque Action Squad 3 pack. If you want them you better act quick because they won't last long.  And these are quality manufactured too, not hand painted or crappy stickers.  These are made just like the real deal.  Check their website out for more stuff you're gonna need at http://citizenbrick.com/. 

Epic Time Suck of the Week: Lego Marvel Super Heroes

    I loooooooooooooooove these Lego games.  It never takes a long time to beat the story mode of them, but it's all the extra stuff you can do that really makes you lose track of your day and allows your garbage to fester to the point where you at least have to throw it on the porch or risk gassing yourself out of he house.  Sure, I could have vacuumed, or did the dishes, but neither one of those things is as fulfilling as finding all of the little super hero mini figures.  And you know what happened when I actually left the house yesterday to get groceries?  Some lady behind me accidently tears open a bag of raw chicken and spills the juice all over one of the self checkout lanes.  It seeped all inside the machine, and got all over her.  Because there obviously is a God, I was finished my transaction and on my way out the door by the time someone came to her rescue with a roll of paper towels.  Now do you see how much safer it is to just stay home and play video games?  I could have died of salmonella poisoning from someone throwing raw chicken around.  The worst that's ever happened to me at home was that time I stubbed and broke my pinky toe and my whole foot turned black. Didn't even come close to killing me though, I just had to walk with a limp for a few days.  And deal with Sharon making fun of me.  Which has irritated me for years until this text message exchange the other day:

Sharon:  Remember that time you broke your toe and I made fun of you, well I'm really sorry.

Me:  Did something happen?

Sharon:  I BROKE MY TOE AND IT'S GONNA TURN BLACK AND FALL OFF AND YOU WON'T EVER BE ABLE TO LOVE ME AGAIN

Me:  Awwww baby, can you bend it.

Sharon: yes

Me:  It's not broken.

Sharon:  Well it hurts and I need new shoes and beef jerky to make it feel better.

    For a split second there karma had enacted vengeance for her making fun of me.  Then karma obviously got busy with something else and let her turn it into a shopping trip.  Focus, karma, focus!

The Greatest Lego Set That You Can't Ever Have

    This is one of the greatest things I've ever seen.  The fine folks at Citizen Brick take it upon themselves to make things that Lego wouldn't ever produce, such as these Breaking Bad inspired build sets.  They're long sold out, and caused a ton of people to be all butt hurt about how inappropriate they were for kids.  For one, if you're young kids are watching Breaking Bad to begin with there's more you need to worry about than toys.  And two, these suckers weren't cheap and I don't think eight year olds have jobs or credit cards, so the danger of them actually getting one is about as high as me buying the new Kanye West cd.  

    Maybe if enough of us beg and plead enough Lego will start a new division of their company that caters to the older collector.   They could make a Sons of Anarchy line, or Game of Thrones, or the Charlie Manson thrill kill playset.  The possibilities are endless.  Come on Lego, there's tons of us old folks that would go crazy for this stuff.  

    And for those of you that start your Christmas shopping early, I want this guy from the Citizen Brick website: