Showing posts with label Maximum Flouride. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Maximum Flouride. Show all posts

Friday, June 16, 2023

Resin Artifacts from Maximum Fluoride/Mike Fisher

 

 

   I've been kind of obsessed with videos online of people exploring abandoned places, but my favorite ones are when they find an old forgotten home. In many instances they are time capsules frozen in a moment where everyone just seems to have disappeared. Entire families worth of belongings will sit caked under layers of dust as if their owners had always intended on returning, but something happened to prevent it. Sometimes the urban explorers will rifle through things but often they will leave it undisturbed. See, this is why I don't even bother trying to participate in something like this because my restraint level is next to zero. I've seen plenty of videos that captured stuff I would want and would have a hard time leaving behind. Everything from lamps to pictures to collectibles; I would have my car loaded. Then, because I really like weird stuff, I would end up bringing something home that was cursed and set of a cataclysmic chain of events that would be beyond the help of any priest. I mean seriously, if you don't want people to desire objects full of bad juju then stop making them look so cool. I'm looking at you, human skulls. 


    I can absolutely see one of the Artifacts from Maximum Fluoride stashed away in a forgotten crate in a creepy basement, just waiting for me to find it and declare how perfect it would look on my dresser. That's how the ghosts get you! But I refuse to learn my lesson because good design is always more important than old curses. And these are all brand new, so they haven't even had the chance to be infused with the woe of the ancients yet. 


   There are three different versions to chose from including two pyramid shapes and one made to look like a coffin. All three are available in different color ways that enhance the expert sculpting of Hollywood effects pro Caleb Schneider.  All are available now at https://maximumfluoride.bigcartel.com/.

    

Thursday, December 12, 2013

New Artifacts Releasing Today from Maximum Fluoride



    These are the kinds of things that teenagers find in abandoned cabins in the forest right before they get slaughtered.  Touching one will certainly open a portal to another dimension that is filled with creatures beyond what our human minds can comprehend.  Blood thirsty and hungry for power they will step into our world, devour our souls, and render our WiFi signals unusable.  

    Ok, none of that will probably happen unless either a.) you're house was built on an indian burial ground or b.) you seriously need your meds adjusted.  But I say throw caution to the wind and welcome one of these Artifacts from Maximum Fluoride into your life.  Worst case scenario is you have an awesome conversation piece that will make you feel like Indiana Jones.  Best case is that you become some sort of supreme overlord that rules an army of the undead.  Either way, pick one up when they go on sale at noon today from http://maximumfluoride.bigcartel.com/.