Attend the First Ever Sucklord Artist Lecture

    You looking for something classy to do with your new Whole Food's shopping friends that play in the band who only use antique ink wells as instruments?  This is not that event.  But if you're looking to have a good time, learn the secrets of being an international toy bootlegger, and probably meet other folks of ill repute, then do I have your plans sewn up for Friday night.  The Sucklord is hosting an artist talk at Con Artist Collective in New York.  For a mere $6 you will not only get to hear a world famous artist wax poetic about his life and work, but you also get a free toy and a drink ticket!  It's like buying a Happy Meal but without the heart disease!  Get more info and tickets at https://conartistnyc.com.  

Hang with The Sucklord this Saturday at Woot Bear

    Any opportunity you have to hang out with The Sucklord is guaranteed to be an interesting time.  What will he say?  What will he do?  Will anyone be wearing a shirt?  Find out for yourself when The Sucklord opens his solo show "A Little Gay, A Little Star Wars, a Little Bit of Everything!" this Saturday at Woot Bear in San Fransisco.  Bring your money and buy some awesome bootleg figures that will make you happy.  Like for real, you can't be upset when you look at his creations and if you are maybe you're a sociopath.  You should get that checked out.  

    All the details you need are in that picture there, so I really don't have much more to do here.  How's your week going?  Mine has been okay, same old same old ya know?  Good talking with ya.

Suck-Pop Gay Empire Pin from The Sucklord

    Not everything you want to do in life is practical.  For instance I'm never going to headline Wrestlemania and I've lightly come to terms with that.  And you are never going to be able to wear one of The Sucklord's resin figures on your jean jacket without having your mental stability questioned.  But fear not, because the always enterprising man behind the brand has solved that problem with this new enamel pin.  For a mere $13 you can take the essence of The Sucklord wherever you go.  Stick it right next to your Def Leppard patch and feel confident as you entire into any business meeting.  Pin it to your lunch box and make that peanut butter and jelly sandwich look like something Gordon Ramsey would punch a baby to eat.  Pierce your ear with it and learn all about infectious disease from your trip to the emergency room.  The possibilities are limited only by your imagination/pain threshold.  

Available now from http://suckadelic.myshopify.com

The Sucklord Has Bugs

    When we look back at the work of the Sucklord, will these be the pieces that speak most to art enthusiasts?  Will these be the ones in which he captured life in Metropolis in its rawest form, thus stirring the emotions of both those who've experienced it and those for which it is a foreign concept?  Would you believe me if I told you that I don't even drink?

    The Sucklord will one day be regarded as the genius we all know he is and by then his work will be unaffordable.  So the time to invest is now, when just one trip to donate some plasma could set you up with either one of these beauties.  And I hear they give you juice and cookies too!  

www.suckadelic.com

New Bootleg Weirdness from The Sucklord

    I noticed something in Wal Mart the other day that concerned me.  The bug spray was located directly next to the sandwich bags and the aluminum foil.  Someone determined that the stuff used to inflict a violent end on unwelcome guests in your house would be best positioned next to the objects you pack your children's lunch with.  It's kind of an odd choice, I thought, but then maybe I'm reading too much into it.  I've been accused of that (wrongly) on a few occasions, but I might add that my suspicions have kept me alive thus far, so who's overreacting now, mom?  

  Doing some last minute shopping for the toy collector/awesome blog dude on your list?  Then look no further than these new releases from The Sucklord.  Yeah, I said releases, because he has TWO crazy resin bootleg figure guys for the most discerning of connoisseurs.  Get one, get em both, get em now at www.Suckadelic.com.

Odyssey 2 from The Sucklord

    The Sucklord released two new figures this week, but one already sold out so there's no point in me making you fall in love with it just to break your heart the way Jenny did in third grade when she knew you liked her yet kissed Michael by the swing set any way.  I'm no Jenny.  So I'm going to tell you about the one still available for purchase called Odyssey 2.  This is in no way the bangin sequel to Homer's epic Greek tale that we will seemingly never get (Even though it takes Guns and Roses less time to record an album. Step it up, Homer!) but is in fact a tribute to classic video games of the past.  It harkens to a time when somehow people were able to have fun with two pixelated sticks and a ball that bounced back and forth and didn't need things like "sex" or "violence" in their video game systems.  Sounds boring.  

    Pick this dude up here and never forget how blessed you are to have grown up with Grand Theft Auto.  

Post NYCC Suck Salon with the Sucklord

   I could only go to New York Comic Con for two days, which is plenty for me because I felt like I was training to become a cage fighter by the end.  How do people make it through all four days?  My legs hurt, my mind is completely overloaded by all there is to see, and I crave the normalcy of cleaning litter boxes and wanting to kill myself while working with the public.  Familiarity is the meat of the hamburger of life.

   I met the Sucklord at Comic Con and he told me about this shindig he was throwing that is gonna involve adult beverages, and toys, and probably some pictures you won't be able to post on any but you're most secretive of social media.  And you can buy stuff, which is the best kinda party there is.  Think about when your mom used to go to Tupperware parties and she would be all turnt up and let you stay up to watch Nick at Nite until she came home and the babysitter was mad cute in a "Who's the Boss" era Alyssa Milano type of way and you would try to do stunts to impress her cause you think that's how you get a wife?

 It's not like that at all. 

    Tons of stuff will be for sale, and by tons I mean anything you can get on the subway or in a cab or an Uber.  Cash is king and you can be too with all your new Suckadelic stuff.  The details are in the photo, so you should go and create memories that will last a lifetime/until you sober up.    

Hang Out With The Sucklord Later Today for Some Food and A New Figure

   What are you doing later today?  Are you stuck at work?  Going to a baseball game?  Attending a funeral?  Well, cancel all your plans cause if you live in the New York area you are now going to break bread with the Sucklord as he celebrates the release of his newest bootleg figure, the Chili Oil Trooper.  You may nhttp://www.suckadelic.comot recognize this figure because the food court scene inside the Death Star got cut from the original Star Wars, but I can assure you this bro was there cooking up Asian delights for those hardworking cogs of the Empire.  Remember his sacrifice today from 4-8pm at the Nom Wah Bakery in sweaty New York City.  GPS that jawn and get going so you make it on time.  

Wanted: The Masked Marauder from The Sucklord

    Ol Cobra Commander looks like he may be riding a horsie too big for him.  I'm just concerned that he's gonna pull his groan playing cowboy and no ones gonna take him seriously as a super villain if he walks around like he's got a poop in his trousers.  I don't care what acts of horror anyone may have committed, as soon as they display the hint of having soiled their britches the effect is ruined.

   Sucklord has been on a cowboy kick recently, this being the second of his western bootleg offerings.  He made 29 of these and somehow you can still buy one.  You waiting for your W-2's to come in or something?  Buy now, regret later.

http://supersuckstore.com

New Mass Produced Figure for Cheapskates from the Sucklord

    You would think the title to this post was in some way derogatory, but it isn't at all.  I'm just helping the Sucklord maintain his personal brand of taking all your money then calling you an idiot for making it so easy.  The Sucklord is absolutely what the world of designer toys needs; someone who's bold, brazen, and more interesting than your art-school drop out cousin.  You can't help but admire his rebel spirit and even try to capture some of it for yourself by making the best outlaw-ish toy website the internet that refuses to make posts that involve the cut and paste function (wink wink).  

   I always want more Sucklord stuff, but I have to admit, I'm kinda cheap.  I'm cheap in the way that I believe doctors are for rich folk and when I take my trash to the dumpsters I'm looking at it just as much as a discovery expedition as it is one of disposal.  Were you aware that you can get $20 for a busted hot water heater?  And you can use your trash selling skills to buy new, affordable, toys.  Possibly you'd be interested in a new Sucklord 72 figure?  Snag yourself a silver one for $40 (open edition), a gold one for $60 (limited to 100) or a pink one for $65 (limited to 25).  Fo you uber fancy folks who are more liberal with your credit cards you could get one of the Jason Freeny Dissected versions in silver for $75 (limited to 20).   All of these and many more wonders of plastic await you at http://suckadelic.myshopify.com/.