Dead Space 3 Statue from Kotobukiya

    Don't you hate it when you're all dressed up in your fancy futuristic snow suit and you step in a big pile of dead thing?  It's enough to ruin a nice day out in winter's glory.  You're gonna have to leave that boot on the front porch so you don't track biological material all over the carpet then you're gonna forget about it and it will never be as nice as it once was after a few days.  Then you have to buy new boots, which you won't, because instead you'll try and wear your Chuck Taylors in an effort to save money and then your socks will get wet and you'll have to have three toes amputated when frostbite sets in.  The moral of the story is don't step in a pile of dead thing.  

    This is Isaac from Dead Space 3.  If you remember the previous 2 games you will know that he is some  kinda space dude who wakes up and is uber traumatized by the goings on aboard his ship.  Everybody is turning into things called Necromorphs and they jump out at you as soon as it's all quiet and you think you might be a tad bit safe.  In the second game there was a stretch of maybe ten minutes where nothing at all happens while you're searching this abandoned ship and it nearly gave me a panic attack.  

    Kotobukiya made this cool statue to immortalize the game's hero.  It even lights up so it can startle you in the middle of the night when you have to get up to pee.  You can get one of these when they're released in June for $139.99.  

Spaced-Out Bunny from Joe Ledbetter

    I am shocked that the Joe Ledbetter Chaos Bunny that is smokin' a joint would be an exclusive to a store in Amsterdam!!!  I guess it was either here or Jamaica, and from what I'm told the toys stores in Bob Marley's home country leave a lot to be desired.  Actually, no one's ever told me that, I just made it up.

    Pretty much all you need to know is featured in the picture, so let's talk about you.  How have you been?  I've been good myself, working a lot, trying to keep up with this whole blog thing.  I hope you're finding it entertaining and informative.  Or maybe it's just better than doing the housework you've put off for a week now.  I'll take that.   

Jon Paul Kaiser x Outsmart Originals Tee Shirts Take 2

    That monkey looks pissed and he doesn't look like he's going to stop at poo throwing to relieve his anger.  When a monkey makes a face like that you are going to lose an arm and get beaten in the head with it.  I'm just warning you for the next time you're at Ikea and you see a little monkey roaming around in his winter jacket.  

    Any minute now this cute little ape could flip out and ruin your shopping experience.  You thought you were getting some low priced Scandinavian furniture when in fact your going to the emergency room and getting sewn back together like some devil child's teddy bear.  

    Harness the power of the angry monkey in this tee shirt from Jon Paul Kaiser and Outsmart Originals.  You can order one right now at http://www.outsmartoriginals.com/ and it will be mailed out January 2nd, after the shipping department has sobered up from their new year's festivities.  

The Lake Monsters Dredge Bone Edition from Brian Morris

    This is the kind of thing I bet my neighbors expect me to have in my house.  For years, my goal has been to be the weirdo on the block.  I want to own the house that people cross the street not to be close to.  I cemented that position once when I was sitting on my porch, wearing a respirator, and sawing through a pair of fake antlers for an art project right when the school bus was dropping kids off.  I can't tell if my wife was as amused by it as I was, but I found it hilarious.  I also find it to be the cheapest home security system apart from buying a large, scary dog.  Who's gonna break into the house of a guy with a bone saw?  Genius right?

    This is the Lake Monsters Dredge Bone Edition from Brian Morris and Rotofugi.  It's a freaky little thing right?  And little is not entirely accurate as it stands 8 inches tall and is on sale now for only $60.  Buy one, toss it in your window, and have as much fun with your neighbors as I do mine.

Mixed Parts Ultrus Bog from Skinner

    This is what happens when you don't drug test your factory workers.  Shear plastic anarchy.  These are Mixed Parts Ultrus Bogs from Skinner and I feel that I am too OCD to own one.  I would have to buy them all then rearrange them until they all matched, which would completely defeat the purpose.  No one said I was any fun.

    If you have the will power not to try and solve these guys like Rubik's Cubes, then you should buy one tomorrow, December 19th, for $170 from his store http://the-art-of-skinner.myshopify.com/.  He also has lots of other stuff that your mom would love for Christmas.  She told me so herself.

Sam Fout x Argonaut Resins Bone Ghost Agents

    I haven't seen the new James Bond yet because it's still in theaters and not part of any television station's Thanksgiving marathon yet, but I hear its pretty good.  Those movies are always awesome though as they give you new ideas for how you can make your own life more interesting.  First, you need to get a guy who can make you really cool gadgets and give you super spy cars for free.  Next, you're gonna need some Russian bad guys because they always make the best adversaries.  Thirdly, and arguably the most important, you'll need to be found attractive by every woman on Earth.  Mix all these together and let the shenanigans ensue.  Seems easy enough.

    If that all seems like more work that you're up for you can just buy one of the Bone Ghost Agents from Sam Fout and Argonaut Resins and live vicariously through it.  There are only 11 of these dude available and each one is a completely different color.  They each come with a martini glass and a few guns to complete whatever daring missions may arise.  They also come with a signed print from Sam Fout.  The solid color guys are $85 with the clear ones are $100.  You can get your own secret agent man tomorrow, December 18th, at 10 pm Eastern time by going here.

DC Comics Cover Girl Statues

     Yeah superheroes are cool and whatnot, but we know the real reason anyone reads comics is for the girls.  And why wouldn't you?  It's the only place you can see women in spandex that actually should be wearing it.  I worked in a mall for a number of years and the horror stories I could share with you about stretchy fabric and delusional lady folk would haunt your dreams for an eternity.  

    DC Collectibles knows it's all about the ladies and that's why they make stuff like this, which is cool with me.  Look at Poison Ivy looking all fancy in her New 52 redesign.  You can get your mitts on this 11 inch tall botanical beauty this month.

     Or you could wait until the new year to pick up this Silk Spectre statue from the Before Watchmen series.  $149.95 will buy you and all your house guests tickets to her gun show.  

    If you like your women like you like your coffee...wait that doesn't work here.  If you like dead chicks then how about paying tribute to Death herself with this.  Can we really be so lucky that this is actually what the grim reaper looks like?  I have a feeling that he's gonna be closer to the guy from all of the Children of Bodom album covers than this, but we'll all find out someday I suppose.  You can bring this crazy goth girl into your life in February for $99.95.