Dealmaker by Andrew Bell x mphlabs

    I don't trust sales people.  I don't care what it is you're selling, whether it be cars, insurance, boxes of kittens, I don't trust you.  I've had to be that guy that tried to get you to buy things you didn't want, or sign up for dumb rewards cards that you'll forget you have.  I hated pestering people and I hate when they do it to me.  I was buying something for my sister yesterday at a terrible establishment that I used to work at, and I couldn't just get what I wanted without being given the third degree.  I don't care what else in on sale, I don't care about your item of the month, and no, I will not try on a pair of jeans when all I want is a My Little Pony toy.  That's not even remotely reasonable and for that I hope you get rabies.  

    So this Dealmaker from Andrew Bell and mphlabs makes me a little nervous.   Just look at his face.  He's totally gonna get you to buy the undercoating and an extended warranty.  While his intentions may be terrible, I do like his overall look.  And he is supposedly one of the first ever figures made in the US in the traditional Japanese sofubi style.  You can get one for yourself this Thursday at 1pm Eastern time for $35 at www.myplasticheart.com.  

New Toys from Brandt Peters and Kathie Olivas

    I'd love to see a narwhal in person someday.  There a close second on my list to the great white shark, but seeing either one would make me extremely happy.  I guess you couldn't get in one of those shark diving cages to see a narwhal though, cause if he wanted to get close you risk getting impaled by his giant horn.  Has that ever happened before?  (UPDATE:  I just looked it up on Google and the only things involving "impaled" and "narwhal" seem to be in jest.  Looks like it is a silly thing to worry about).

    Mortimer the Mortician isn't as interested in running you through with his horn as he is in preparing your body for its eternal dirt nap.  This narwhal was created by Brandt Peters and come complete with a meat clever and a jug of embalming juice.  $60 will get you one of the four colorways you see here.  

    His friend Oliver was created by Kathie Olivas and resembles a rich little orphan that will one day grow up to defend the city of Gotham.  His little birdy pals supposedly like to feed on corpses.  Me think they should strike a deal with the mortician to make his work load a little less cumbersome.  $60 for each of the four colors that this masked boy come in.  

    Only 200 of each colorway of these figures were made by the folks at Artoyz Paris.  They should be releasing soon.

A Northern Bog from Frank Kozik x Skinner

    Do I even need to express the fact that I would punch your grandmother in the face to own this?  Cause I would knock that old lady out.  For one, I love the Ultrus Bog figure from Skinner, so right there I'm sold on this sucker.  And two, it was hand painted by Frank Kozik.  That's like putting platinum icing on a solid gold cake.  

    There will only be 9 of the Northern Bog figures made and they go on sale May 1st for $200 at www.frankkozik.net.  Do I even need to express the fact that I do not have $200 to spend on this?  I need like a layaway plan or something.  Give me 6 months financing Frank, interest free preferably!  I've got a credit score that makes Visa weep with joy.

Custom Toy of the Week: Ume Toys

    Some people spend tons of time customizing a toy and then call it a day.  Not Richard Page of Ume Toys.  After he spent countless hours making this Fonzo toy look all spiffy, he then customized the pictures he took of it!  It's insanity!  

    This will be part of the Fonzo Loves the UK event at The ShoGallery May 11th, where tons of other artists have also lent their creative minds to reinterpret the mascot of FreakStore.  

Super Series Sunday from Halo Seraphim x Tenacious Toys

    If the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park looked like this it would have been an entirely different movie.  Everyone would have just become friends and had a tea party and whatnot.  Probably would have played some board games, had a book club, listened to the new Decemberists album.  Would have been a pretty chill place.  

    These Nerdasaurus blind boxes will be going on sale tomorrow on www.tenacioustoys.com.  They were created by Halo Seraphim and cast by Scott Kinnebrew.  And they're cute.  Not everything can be skulls and Norwegian black metal.  Not until I am emperor anyway.

The Hell? from We Become Monsters

    I worked with a guy once that looked kinda like this.  while he did have fewer eyes, the tooth count is spot on.  He scared me in a sort of "I want you to come look at my train set in my basement, but ignore the pile of hatchets and chicken feathers" sort of way.  But in the company of other people, that were all able to quickly call the police, he was a nice guy.

    We Become Monsters makes some pretty crazy stuff and The Hell?  ranks right up there with the best of them.  He made seven of these guys, all hand made and all different colors.  Plus they're articulated, which can't be the easiest thing to do.  They stand 6 and 1/2 inches tall and will be $75 each.  They go on sale today (Friday, April 26) at noon Eastern time at http://webecomemonsters.storenvy.com/.  

X-Ray Alter Beast for C2E2 by Scott Wilkowski x Monster Worship

    This is the best thing you will see at C2E2 this weekend.  Forget the rest of the show and make a bee line to the Nakama Toys booth # 951 tomorrow to get the best toy you will see there.  Scott Wilkowski and Monster Worship got together and created this X-Ray Alter Beast made of clear vinyl with a super sick skeleton sculpture inside.  They will be available from 11:30-3:30 at the aforementioned booth.  Seriously, don't even pay to park if it means you can't buy this.  There are plenty of nice hobos that will take great care of your car and may even have it back in time for when you're ready to go home.  And the trunk may or may not be filled with fish.  It's a sign that you're best friends now.