Hand Painted Luftkaiser from Paul Kaiju x Toy Art Gallery

    The United States is all about flying these stupid unmanned drones over all of its cities to spy on everyone, but how long do you think it's gonna be before a bunch of hillbillies start shooting them out of the sky?  Maybe drone taxidermy will become a thing and people will mount their heads over their fireplaces with little brass plaques telling the date and location of their kill.  Yeah, we'll probably never find out if people are doing that because I would imagine the jail time would be pretty intense for shooting down the government's toys, but I'd love for it to catch on.  

    If the government were smart, it would have designed all of its drones to look like a Luftkaiser.  Could you imagine seeing this thing flying around and trying to peek in your windows?  You'd be so terrified the last thing on your mind would be trying to shoot it and get close to it.  Now I would like it to become a thing where the government redesigns all drones to look like monsters.  

    Paul Kaiju hand painted a run of these scary looking dudes that will go on sale exclusively through Toy Art Gallery tomorrow, Friday the 20th, at noon Pacific time.  You can get one for $75, which is a lot less than the fine will be for blowing a drone out of the sky.  I think I said "drone" enough in this post to now be on an official NSA watch list.  Oh joy!

    

Orange Drop 20 Inch Dunny from Andrew Bell x Kidrobot

    These 20 inch Dunnys are like buying a piece of furniture.  Not only do you have to have a decent amount of space for them, but they instantly become one of the first things people see when they enter your house.  We have a pretty awesome vintage couch that takes up most of our living room and people always love.  The other day our cat Jorah is sitting under it, batting around a small tack.  I go to take it from him and quickly realize where it came from.  He had torn the lining under the couch from front to back and created a little hammock for himself.  It was filled with random stuff that we had been missing for a while and he had this look of excitement on his face like he was so proud of his ingenuity and was glad he could finally share it with us.  It was like watching a feline episode of Mtv Cribs:  

"And over here you'll see my treasure hoard.  We have the stopper to the bathtub, about $15 in change,  the checkbook, an old cell phone, and a weird bone that the medical examiner may or may not have interest in."

"To your left is where the hot tub is getting installed, and over here is where the magic happens.  With your shoe.  Don't try and stop our love."

    The good thing about this giant Orange Drop Dunny from Andrew Bell and Kidrobot is that it is made of plastic, so at most Jorah would only be able to leave a few teeth marks in it.  Though it would be massive enough to carve the head out and make a nice cat bed, although a pricey one.  They will be available July 3rd for $399.99.  

Jorah, thinking about his next DIY project.  

The Eldritch Embryos from We Become Monsters

    Seems like everyone around me is having kids.  Sometimes I think I'd be good at raising a child, but other times I'm worried that I may try to sell them to a shoe factory as cheap labor.  And you never really know what you're going to get when you have a child do you?  It's biological gambling.  You may end up with a genius, you may end up with Charles Manson.  Kinda scary when you think about it.  

    What if one of these things pops out and starts calling you "dad"?  You know you're gonna have to ship it off to boarding school and hope it forgets how to get home, otherwise you can expect the rest of your town to eventually show up with torches and pitchforks at your front door.  We Become Monsters may have completely sworn me off of fatherhood with these Eldritch Embryos.  These frightening future monsters are available right now at http://webecomemonsters.storenvy.com/ for $28 each and are sold in random colors.  

More Bedtime Bunnies from Peter Kato

    Attempting to sleep in my house seems like more of an event than it really should be.  You have to make sure your feet are tucked securely beneath a blanket that has proven to be both bite and scratch proof, otherwise you will be awoken with sharp little pains followed by trickles of blood.  Our kitten Jorah has made it his life's mission to eradicate the world of useless toes.  And just the other night I awoke to the little warning coughs of an impending hairball just in time to avoid it being deposited on my forehead by Ophelia.  My pillow and the sheets were unfortunate casualties of the incident, but I rejoiced in making it out relatively unscathed.  

    I wish sleep could be less of a contact sport and as peaceful as it looks on the faces of Peter Kato's Bedtime Bunnies.  I bet they awake refreshed and without new scars from hyperactive kittens.  He's debuting a new color combination of orange and grey and well as restocking his pink and white versions.  They will go on sale this Thursday, June 19th, at midnight for $20 for the 3 inch versions, while the slightly smaller 2 and 1/2 inch ones will be $12.  They sell out every time they are offered, so get to http://peterkatoshop.com/ early and be ready.  

Holiday Harley Quinn Bombshells Statue from DC Collectibles

    Do stores have their Christmas decorations up yet?  I don't really pay attention when I go into places, because I usually know exactly what I want, grab it, and play a fun game called "let's get the hell out of here before we catch what these people have."  That game is really only effective at Wal-Mart, who do have the lowest grocery prices around if you can fight your way through the hoard of mutants.  The trick is to not make eye contact, but you do miss a lot as a result.  Hence the fact that there may be Christmas trees littering the aisles and I wouldn't even have seen them.  I'm only oblivious to things when trying not to become the love prisoner of a gaggle of toothless hillbillies.  

    Now this is a holiday decoration I can get behind!  Harley Quinn's Bombshell statue got a festive remake just in time for you to start doing your house up in the spirit of the season.  Or if you don't celebrate Christmas for whatever reason you can still buy one and be marveled at how cute a fictional sociopath can be.  These will be available later in the year from DC Collectibles.  

   

Gummi Keiko: Sweet of the Dead from Fools Paradise

    One of the funniest things I've seen on the internet recently are the sugar free Gummi Bear reviews on Amazon.  Evidently whatever they use to sweeten those little squishy critters will make the fires of hell erupt from your backside.  For hours.  The stories are horrifying and hilarious at the same time.  If you're ready to laugh until you yourself feel ill, then click this link and revel in tales of the digestive misery of others.   

    So this guy is pretty frightening.  Try to ever eat a Gummi Bear again without thinking of a tiny skinned corpse sitting inside of it.  Not that it would make them any less delicious mind you, but if you feel a crunch when you bite into it you'll know what it was from. 

   This figure from Fools Paradise is pretty amazing though.  We've seen the anatomical versions of this candy before, but never like this.  I love how detailed the inner figure is, especially the painting of the muscles.  They're up for preorder right now at http://doublefools.blogspot.com/ through July 11th.  

Hazardous Taste Dunny from Sket-One x Huck Gee

    Anyone that knows me knows that I love orange Vitamin Water.  Or, I suppose I "loved" it until they recently changed the sweetener in it and made it taste disgusting.  Why do companies do that?  I couldn't have been the only person buying them by the case.  Sprite and 7up did it too in an effort to appease the health nuts and now both of those taste like drinking carbonated air freshener.  Their should be legislation that prevents stuff like this from happening.  We can call it the Lucas Law, in honor of the man who decided Star Wars was too brilliant and that he should add some cgi nonsense to it years later because being a billionaire is boring work unless you can ruin everything that people love.  Vitamin Water, you are the computer animated Jabba the Hut of the beverage world.  

    Ok, so this Dunny is called Hazardous Taste, but his contents look delicious, like that Ecto Cooler Hi-C put out years ago.  Couldn't be that bad for you, right?  Huck Gee and Sket-One have teamed up again for yet another impressive Dunny release.  And the clock has already started ticking on your ability to get one, because the window of opportunity to order closes when the clock strikes midnight tonight.  Only the amount ordered will be produced so you need to be a man (or woman) of action and get yourself in on the deal.    

Order now at http://www.sket-one.com/