She-Drone from Goodleg Toys Dropping Tomorrow Night

    All of us dudes have gone through those lean times in our dating lives, where a pretty girl wouldn't talk to you if she was on fire and you were carrying jugs of water.  But always lurking around the bushes are those ladies whose outward appearance and inner personality can only be explained by their mothers dabbling in methamphetamine during pregnancy.  And you're kinda lonely so you start trying to justify reasons that would make going out with her look like a good idea.  Let me tell you a little story:

    Many moons ago when I was a young lad I went on a blind date with this girl that one of my coworkers (who in hindsight must have hated me) set up.  I knew I should have bailed the moment I went to pick her up and it turned out she lived with her dad in a camper and his only means of employment was sitting around with his shirt unbuttoned asking people if they wanted to buy "some good stuff."  Still, I was trying to be open minded (see also: lonely, desperate, kinda sad) and was promised that the girl was at least cute and nice.  Which she was both, but for those of you that are into setting other people up on dates here is a bit of advice:  it is always nice to know ahead of time if someone has a horribly contagious and incurable disease IN THEIR EYE.  This girl was sporting a pretty impressive collection of herpes sores next to her right eye and it's all that I could look at.  But being the nice guy I am I still took her out to lunch (cause I was hungry) and then pretended that something had slipped my mind and I really had to get her home so I could take care of it.  She was suspicious, but understanding and tried to lean over to give me a kiss goodbye as I was dropping her off.  I panicked.  All I could see where those things getting closer and closer to me and my future life as the Elephant Man.  I unbuckled my seat belt, opened the door and hopped out like I had just sat down on a rattlesnake.  I went around to her side, opened her door and told her I'd give her a call sometime.  Her phone may have rang afterward, but I was never on the other line.  

   A few years later I met the woman of my dreams and lived happily ever after.  My point in all of this is that this She-Drone from Goodleg Toys recalls my sketchy dating past.  While my memories are not fond nor are they easily worked through with the help of psychotherapy, I can appreciate that if I were to be involved in an intergalactic war I would probably want this chick on my side.  She will be available starting Friday at midnight over at http://goodlegtoys.storenvy.com/.

Zomb MD and Nurse from 3A

    When you go to the hospital and this is the guy that is assigned to take care of you, you will quickly realize how crappy your insurance is.  When you're picking your plan from your employer, never check the box that says "Civil War Coverage" cause this is what you end up with.  Sure it's more cost effective, but that's because they don't have to worry about paying for silly useless things like clean gloves or anesthesia.  And just get a look at this dude.  No doctor I've ever seen carries around a bone saw on his belt like some sort of wild west surgical outlaw. But his nurses have legs for days, which will probably distract you long enough for him to get the restraints in place and decide where he's gonna make his first cut.  

    If you weren't already weird about going to the doctor, 3A is gonna try to give you a hefty fear of healthcare with these guys.  For $260 you can get the doctor and his two nurse companions, or for $120 you can just go for the Black Rose Zomb Nurse and you could play the role of doctor yourself.  The sale goes down tomorrow at 9am Hong Kong time at http://www.bambalandstore.com/. 

Tons of New Releases from Rsin Tomorrow

    

    So I'm having an internal debate with myself today.  My car started making this weird noise and whenever something happens with one of our vehicles my first reaction is to fall in the floor while clutching my guts (because by now I've worried myself to the point of a stomach ache) and hope that it's no big deal.  So today the debate continues:  do I ignore the noise and hope that somehow little engine trolls appear to magically fix it, or do I spend my day sitting at a repair shop while they create a master list of every wire and bolt that needs to be replaced?  I better type faster because I can feel my intestines tying themselves into knots.

    I need to think happy thoughts, and the work of Rsin is gonna have to transport me to that magical land where people don't worry about fixing their cars. How can you not feel better about things while looking at these dudes?  You can add one to your collection tomorrow when all of them go on sale over at www.whispers.storenvy.com.  

Rocket Raccoon Labbit from Frank Kozik x Kidrobot

    I am one of five people in the continental United States that has yet to see Guardians of the Galaxy, but even without seeing it there's no way my favorite character could be anyone other than Rocket Raccoon.  First off, I love raccoons.  Secondly, he is sassy and carries heavy firepower.  I love woodland creatures with guns!!!!!!!!!  

   Frank Kozik had a limited number of these dudes on sale at San Diego Comic Con and they sold out really quickly.  Then some turned up on eBay for a ridiculous amount of money.  The joke's on those fools who thought they were so clever and had such a perfect scheme to make some cash, cause the general release of these Labbits from Kidrobot is tomorrow.  

   Did I even tell you the best part about this Labbit?  I didn't?  HE HAS A FUZZY TAIL!!!!!!!!!  You could pet it if you want, or hold it against you while you're not wearing a shirt.  There's nothing wrong with a grown man holding a fluffy critter next to his bare chest, despite your neighbors yelling at you to "close your curtains, freak".  They're just jealous.  

Teal Bedtime Bunnies from Peter Kato

    When you have a house full of cats there really is no need for an alarm clock, because they will take turns waking you up every few hours anyway.  For animals that like to nap so much, you would think they would have a healthy respect for my need to rest.  Early on in the night it starts out with a headbutt here and there and it's kinda cute, but the closer it gets to morning that's when their efforts get harsher.  For instance, I woke up this morning because one of them was trying to separate my pinky toe from the rest of my foot.  My theory is that they are either worried that we are dead and we can no longer turn on their favorite tv shows for them or that they're checking to see if they can eat us yet.  Sharon and I have tried to combat their need to wake us with tooth and claw by a blanket we call "cat armor".  It is merely a thick comforter that has thus proven impenetrable to their attack methods when we are at our most vulnerable.  The problem is when you get too hot and you peek a foot or a whole leg out from its protective embrace, thus sending out a signal that you are asking to be blood let.  

    While I descend into eventual madness from a lack of good sleep you should make yourself ready to welcome new Bedtime Bunnies into your life.  Peter Kato is releasing his latest edition in teal.  There are 24 figures in total, with 2 different sizes to choose from and variations in tones throughout.  They will be released tomorrow, August 7th, at 9pm only at http://peterkatoshop.com/.

Super7 x Funko Horror Film ReAction Figures

    I would imagine the thing most people say when they see these figures for the first time is "where were these when I was a kid", but let's be real, there's no way your parents would have bought you a bunch of fictional mass murders to play with.  Unless they really wanted to spend their retirement coming to visit you at the state penitentiary.  But now that you're an adult most people probably already know that you're a weirdo and your parents can rest assured that they got you this far amd the fact that you eat your oatmeal from a human skull certainly can't be a result of how you were raised.  

    Make up for the lost time you could have spent tormenting your other toys with these horror series ReAction figures from Funko and Super 7.  Think of the adventures G.I. Joe missed out on!  Get em all when they're released next month for $9.99 each.  

I Kinda Need This Godzilla Plush from Steiff

    Between my wife and I, we have a crazy amount of stuff that we collect.  One of my favorite things to hoarde is antique Steiff stuffed animals, which always shocks people.  It's not the mummified fetal pig, or the at home shock therapy device, it's the little German critters covered in mohair that leave everyone surprised.  I like things that have a story behind the object.  A few that I have were once owned by a young girl whose father bought them for her when she was in the hospital and she kept them next to her in bed until she recovered.  She would be in her 80's or 90's now if she is still alive and I feel like I am the caretaker of these objects that aided in her recovery.  It's rare that you get insight like that into the journey that something has had before you came upon it, and it's the stories that really make them worth beyond any monetary sum.  

    I don't own any of the newer Steiff toys, but I could be easily persuaded to change my collecting scope to add this Godzilla to my display case.  Does it get any more amazing than this?  They made 1,954 of these to coincide with the year the first movie was released and they will only be available in Japan to the tune of $500 each.  I don't know that I've ever spent $500 on anything other than something I could drive or live in and just the thought of doing so is starting to clog my arteries.  Let's pass the hat around and take up a collection.