Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Lil Demon Kewpie Preorder from DuBose Art



    Oh look, the true form of children has been exposed!  This perfectly captures those awkward childhood years, right before a person determines to continue on this path and become Ted Bundy, or change themselves into responsible citizens like those fellas on Shark Tank.  
   
    Kids are evil.  There's no other way to explain why they keep you up at night, laugh when you get hurt, and break all your stuff.  You know why they cry when you take their picture with Santa?   It's because of their flesh burning at the touch of anything good a wholesome.  Santa's lap is like holy water to those little devils.  

   Of course I'm kidding (am I?) and children are wondrous little miracles that make you smile and bring joy to your heart (except when their filthy drug habits force you onto an episode of Intervention).  DuBose Art has put these adorably horrifying Lil Demon Kewpies up for preorder on his website right now for your collecting pleasure.  Each resin figure comes in unpainted flesh (every child's meal of choice) and stands 3 and 1/2 inches tall.  Order your demon spawn at http://duboseartanddesign.com/.       

Monday, December 29, 2014

Civic Defense Bertie Mk2 and Mule Rev3 from 3A



    It boggles the mind why we don't have war robots for real yet.  I know that if we did we'd be sliding down that slippery slope towards total human annihilation from our soon to be sentient robot overlords, but how awesome do these guys look?  And if I learned anything from watching Smokey and the Bandit a 1,000 times, it's not what happens at the end, but how cool you look getting there.    

    3A should be commissioned to design all of the world's military weaponry.  War would be so much more stylish.  Until that day comes, you'll have to buy up everything they make and pretend in the privacy of your own home.  Right now you can preorder these Civic Defense dudes over at http://www.bambalandstore.com/ to add to your collection/ongoing quest for world domination in your living room.  


Friday, December 26, 2014

Okami Limited Edition Resin Figure from Fakir



    Our cats were all about Christmas yesterday.  Every year we buy them a ton of little toys, open them all at once, and watch the madness ensue as they try to play with everything.  It's quite entertaining/dangerous for my wife and I.  Whats really weird is you can buy them a ton of stuff and you will never see most of it again.  I don't know if they stow them away for when hard times hit or if they're shoving them down the vents in the floor, but it's a strange phenomena that warrants further investigation.

    Is this dude a cat?  A dog?  A really pale raccoon?  I dunno, but I know I like him.  Fakir will be releasing a limited run of ten of these resin dudes on Monday, January 5th, through http://fakirdesign.com/.  Each one comes with a signed print and a sticker.

    

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Merry Christmas from The Toy Viking



    I hope you all have a great Christmas, get all the presents you can handle, and eat until they have to cut a hole in your roof to airlift you out.  

Toy Art Gallery's Holiday Sale



    Today is that glorious day where I showcase my terrible present wrapping skills.  I usually do fairly well on the first one or two, but then I just start to rush through it, creating more of an over-taped wad of paper than anything resembling something Martha Stewart would make.  The bright side is that I've set the bar so low that everyone expects me to do a bad job which alleviates any pressure I may have once felt.  

   Thankfully I have at least completed all of my shopping so I don't have to fight through the madness of retail on Christmas Eve.  I can just sit at home, procrastinate on the present wrapping, and maybe or maybe not get dressed for the day.  And I can also peruse all the stuff from Toy Art Gallery that I want, which is a lot.  The good thing is from now until the new year is that it's all 20% off.  Buy yourself something nice with all of your gift cards at www.toyartgallery.com.  

Thursday, December 18, 2014

Milky Purple Slugbeard Lottery from Paul Kaiju x Toy Art Gallery



    My wife and I have a black cat named Icarus who has a bit of an eating disorder.  He likes to ingest anything from shoe laces and string to loosely woven fabrics.  One time he ate half of a shirt sleeve and had to go to the emergency vet to have some help in passing it.  We lock up all of our shoes and clothing and anything else we think he might decide to nibble on.  But sometimes you can't help what he decides is gonna taste good, especially if it's something you didn't bring into the house.  

   We first met Icarus when he was a kitten and he became lodged behind the engine of my car.  Four hours later and with the aid of a tow truck lifting the front of the car, we were able to liberate him from his automotive prison, and hoist him above our heads for the gathered crowd to see (picture the Lion King with more grease).  Needless to say the experience was rough on him and he wasn't too into being social, and by not too into it I mean he wouldn't let us touch him for six months.  He loved our other two cats but he was kind of leary people.  Slowly he began to socialize more and more with us; coming up to us to pet him, sitting near us on the couch, etc.  This is when we began to notice his weird eating habits, which we attributed to his traumatic experience of having been trapped for who knows how long underneath the car.  

    One night he was playing behind the couch and we started to hear this weird slurping noise.  We figured he had gotten into something we missed and was now making a meal of it.  I pulled the couch back to take it from him and witnessed, what is to this day, the weirdest thing any of my cats has ever tried to eat.  There, laying on the carpet, was a slug with the back half of its slime sucked clean off of his body.  My wife asks me what he has, and I tell he she doesn't want to know (she thinks slugs are the grosses things in the world) but she looks anyway.  I'd never seen her move so fast to get as far away from something.

    The moral of the story is my cat tried to eat a slug and my wife would probably object to me owning anything named Slugbeard.  But look how pretty Paul Kaiju's monstrous creation looks cast in a milky shade of purple.  I think she'd be able to look past the name don't you?

    Toy Art Gallery will be holding a lottery to give you the chance to buy one of these pretty behemoths.  Starting tomorrow at noon pacific time and running through December 22nd at noon pacific, you can send your pertinent details (PayPal address, shipping info) in an email to sales@toyartgallery.com with the subject line "Slugbeard Lottery".  Then you cross all your fingers and toes and hope the toy gods smile upon you.  If you win, you have to pony up $165 (which is a steal considering how freakin huge this thing is) and then wait patiently for the mail to come.  No early or multiple entries suckas.    

Alice In Wonderland Bedtime Bunnies from Candie Bolton x Peter Kato



    Have you ever thought about just how Alice fell down a rabbit hole in Alice in Wonderland?  How big was that freakin bunny that it could dig a hole wide enough to swallow up a kid?  Or was he just an overachiever who was trying to show off his advanced constructing skills? Yeah, I know it's not based on a true story and that its a pretty wacky story overall.  I just want to make sure that there isn't some species of mutant bunnies trying to get rid of mankind on the sly.  What if they're responsible for those sinkholes you always hear about that cars and houses fall into?  I think this needs more investigation.

    Don't let the new panic I've instilled in you take away from this amazing collaboration between Candie Bolton and Peter Kato.  She's given 10 of his Bedtime Bunnies the Wonderland treatment and you could be lucky enough to own one when they go on sale tonight at 6pm eastern time only at http://peterkatoshop.com/.  Each one is $75 and comes packaged like a deck of cards.