A Clockwork Carrot: Lil Alex Haunted Edition from Frank Kozik x Blackbook Toy

    I'm glad that the "haunted" part of this toy is just implied and not really a testament to the fact that a malevolent spirit has taken up residence in it.  I have enough things in my house with the potential for bad juju without having to worry about the toys I buy needing a young and old priest.  For my birthday my wife bought me an antique glass eye cause I've kinda been obsessed with them for a while.  The craftsmanship on them are mind blowing and they really are stunning little works of art that just so happened to have once resided in a real human being's vacant ocular cavity.  No big deal right?  But on the off chance that the previous owner is not too happy about not entering the afterlife with his prized prosthetic, the wife and I found a vintage pill box, propped it up with some cotton, and gave it a display fit for royalty. Or hopefully fit enough to calm any angry ghosts.  When you have peculiar tastes you sometimes have to go out of your way to prepare for anything.

    This is my favorite edition of Frank Kozik's Lil Alex figure by far.  I like the fact that it's made out of what I can only describe as a smoky vinyl.  Sounds classy right?  Like you could be sipping Absinthe and discussing art with Marlene Dietrich in Weimar-Era Berlin.  

Snap out of it doll face and flick your cigarette already before you burn yourself. 

    Blackbook Toy has this guy available right now on their website: http://www.blackbooktoy.com.  

Goodleg Toys Presents The Masters of the Underworld

    You ever see professional wrestlers when they stop competing and they don't have to work out 13 times a day?  They shrivel right up and look like normal dudes.  When you're a skeleton you really have to stay up on your fitness game or you deflate like an untied balloon.  Just look at my boy Skeletor here.  Bro stops chasing He-Man around and he loses his physique.  Personally, I think he was juicing the whole time, but I'm not trying to get a lawsuit thrown my way.  I can't afford those legal fees.

     Goodleg Toys is proud to present their newest mash-up entitled Masters of the Underworld.  You can pick one of these carded versions for $65 (limited to 5 pieces each) or one of the $40 bagged versions (5 one colored pieces and 5 two color pieces).  They go on sale January 15th at 11am GMT time only through http://goodlegtoys.storenvy.com

The Four Horsies of the 'Pocalypse Kickstarter is Now Live

    Let me tell you something, I've now watched two documentaries on the whole "Brony" thing and I am not a fan.  Each movie was filled with countless socially awkward men waxing poetic about friendship and other life lessons taught to them by little horses intended to amuse little girls.  Stop being wusses with your wussy shows!!!  Horses can be tough, and cool, and you don't have to try to hide them from your biker friends.  Just look, look with your man eyes and behold horses that are so tough they could bring about the actual end of the world!!

    Keep your man cred while filling your toy shelves with The Four Horsies of the 'Pocalypse.  But like anything sinister and fun, they need you to open a door to this world and welcome them in.  Don't bother dusting off your Necronomicon though, cause the only way to make this set of figures from Bigshot Toyworks a reality it by supporting their Kickstarter campaign.  The coveted reward in obviously the four figures you see, but there are tons of other items for everyone's budget and interest, including a pretty amazing bust of their previously funded Maddie.  Leave those other ponies for the kids and get your hands on these by visiting this link.  

2015 3A Membership Packs

    You know what I miss?  Fan clubs.  How you used to be able to write away to your favorite band and they would send you newsletters and other random stuff in the mail.  Now everything is done through the internet, and the excitement of opening an email is not nearly as great as rushing out to the mailbox every day to see if you received a letter.  Plus, I'm more of a tactile person anyway.  I like physical objects to hold in my hand, actual pages to flip through and pour over.  When I was younger most music magazines had addresses in the back for just about every popular artist at the time and I would write my sappy little fan letters and just hope that I would get any response at all.  Some of my favorite bands (or the people that worked for them) sent me guitar picks and post cards and various other things that I still have.  I'll post some stuff on Instagram later if you're interested.

    3A's membership pack brings back all of those memories of fan clubs and postal stalking.  Not only do you get four awesome figures from the newer 3AGO line, but you get a t-shirt, a print signed by Ashley Wood, and most importantly that 15% off discount at http://www.bambalandstore.com/ for the entire year.  Membership packs go live January 15th at 9am Hong Kong time for 24 hours only.  $190 will get you one and they will ship out in May, so you don't have to camp out waiting for the delivery man.  

http://www.bambalandstore.com/

Mini "Our Father" Resin Sculpture from Sket-One

    I love Star Wars.  Those original three films basically sum up everything that was good about being a kid.  The last three films taught me about disappointment and how to harness my murderous rage into something more productive. The seventh film comes out this year and I'm holding out hope that it doesn't make me want to stab an usher at the theater.  

   I've got so much Star Wars stuff that I can't even display it properly.  What it really needs is a focal point, something that can elevate every piece to the status it deserves.  What it needs is the statue you see above.  This sculpture from Sket-One is the perfect centerpiece for any shrine dedicated to light sabers and chicks in gold bikinis.  Standing a foot tall and made of resin, this is something your grandchildren will beat each other senseless to inherit.  It would be worth it to fake your own death just to witness the carnage.  Pick one up at http://www.sket-one.com.  

Judge Death Gets the 3A Treatment

    You know that panicked feeling you get when you're speeding down the road with not a care in the world and all of a sudden you pass a police car hiding in the woods?  And you're looking in your rearview mirror, alternating between curses and prayers and just hoping that you don't see him pull his car onto the road and if he does trying to think quickly about whether there's a side street you can duck down without being seen and therefore avoiding a ticket whose fine could be utilized for something way more important.  Now imagine if it was this guy that pulls you over.

    I'm not cracking any donut shop jokes within earshot of Judge Death.  You can just tell he's never let anyone off with a warning.  This insanely detailed 1/12 scale figure is courtesy of the folks at 3A and will be available for preorder January 14th at 9am Hong Kong time for $60.  If you order from http://www.bambalandstore.com/ you also get free shipping world wide.  

Squatting Dog Sofubi Kickstarter

    Ummmmmm.  You would think that I would have a field day writing about a pooping dog toy, but I'm seriously having some problems with this one.  Maybe this is just too easy, and being handed such a gift has created a huge blockage in my mind.  It's like I need a mental laxative to get the ideas flowing again.  Okay, we have a dog, and he's desperately trying to dot your yard with little brown land mines, and it's captured in Japanese vinyl for all of eternity.  I'm kinda wondering what's on his mind as he performs the most humiliating of acts for all to see.  I bet he's laughing on the inside as he watches his owner cover his hand in an old shopping bag, ready to retrieve the mess.  The human/dog relationship is really one sided when you think about it.  Any relationship that requires you to handle turds is kind of abusive.

    Right now there's a campaign on Kickstarter to help fund these little plastic poopers and get em into production and on your shelf.  Yeah, it's different,but you have to admit that dropping the old deuce is and always was hilarious, so for pure comedic factor alone buying one is kinda worth it.  And imagine if you get someone one as a present.  Their reaction could be Youtube gold.  Help move these further down the pipeline and into reality by supporting their campaign here.