The Iron Monster "1939" edition from Miscreation Toys

    Dude looks pissed!  He must have gone to the doctor last year for this weird pain he was having and was shocked by how little his insurance actually covers.  And it's a new shock every time you go and get the mail and there's a balance due for another test that was run.  Yeah, he's obviously very mad about the state of health care in America and how ridiculously expensive it is to not die in this country.  Not that I would know anything about that, but I can see it in his face.

    Who am I kidding, The Iron Monster looks that way because he wants to end you.  And because the next season of Downton Abbey is reported to be the last, but mostly because he wants you dead.  You should make all his dreams come true and invite the 1939 edition of this killing machine into your home when Miscreation Toys puts him up for sale tomorrow (Friday March 27th) at 9pm eastern time.  Each one will sell for $200, or you can get an all black blank version for $150.  

Adopt yourself a monster at http://autopsybabies.bigcartel.com/.

New YinYang Tuttz and More from Argonaut Resins Available Tonight

    This pretty much sums up the dual personalities of cats pretty well.  On the one hand they're all sweet and cuddly and want nothing more than your affection.  On the other hand they are devious little psychopaths who want nothing more than to climb your new curtains like they were training for Wrestlemania.  And you never know from one minute to the next which version you're going to get.  Unless they're napping, then you can bring your expensive stuff back out of hiding with minimal fear that it will end up stolen and under the bed where they know you can't get them back.  Our littlest one is especially devious, as she sits on her hoard like Smaug on Dwarf gold.  

    Argonaut Resins is loading up his web store tonight with a bunch of new stuff playing off of the  theme of duality.  There will be 10 of these stunning black and white 8 inch Tuttz cats available.  Each one is $165 shipped and will come with a matching Tuttz magnet, a set of stickers, and a sketch card.  

    Also releasing tonight will be a one-off Kings of Atlantis Skull made to mimic the kitty. This guy will be available for $175.  

    Everything goes live tonight at 9pm eastern time only at http://argonautresins.bigcartel.com/.  

    

    

Mint Green Lurkfoot from Lurk x Toy Art Gallery

    I'm gonna have to start billing Toy Art Gallery for the amount of time I dedicate to them.  It's amazing how much they have going on, between their insane art shows and the amount of product they release that Gino and company have easily become one of the most active entities in designer toys.  Without further ado, let's get to it (and the bill's in the mail).

    Did you know that if a domestic pig gets loose and lives in the woods that in 6 months time it will grow tusks, get really hairy, and become completely wild?  Supposedly that's why they find those giant hogzillas in the southern United States, doing whatever hogzillas do.  I think that's what all Bigfoot sightings are; just a random hillbilly a that couldn't find their way home and went feral.  I'll be happy to appear on one of those Discovery Channel shows and explain my theory.

    This 9 inch tall Lurkfoot from Lurk will be available today starting at noon pacific time.  It's made out of mint green vinyl that probably is not flavored like after diner mints, so don't lick it.  Or do lick it, have the weird plastic chemicals go to your brain, and become a feral hillbilly and get your own reality show!

www.toyartgallery.com

    

The Gulf OBP from Huck Gee

  When I first moved to New Jersey I lived with my family right outside of Philadelphia.  That city made me dream big, and I was gonna do big things, but first I needed to get a job.  I started out with high expectations, maybe a little too high, and then kept lowering them day by day until I finally landed a gig selling home security systems.

 Door to door.

In some of the worst neighborhoods of the city.

   A van dropped me and a few other guys off on a corner early every morning and picked us up for lunch, then found another destitute are for us to try out until it was time to call it a day.  Dressed in khaki pants and polo shirts, we were often mistaken for cops.  So much so that I began carrying around one of the yard signs for the company I worked for just so no one thought I was there trying to investigate them.  It stopped me from getting called a narc, but it also had added benefit.  Once when someone wasn't interested In buying a full security system they asked if they could just buy the sign.  Cha-ching I had started my own little side business within the business that I couldn't make a penny off of in the usual way.  For twenty bucks you could have a sign, place that sucker in your window, and put just enough doubt in the mind of a burglar that they rob your idiot neighbors instead of you.

    I probably could have sold what I was actually supposed to if they has included something like this.  Imagine it: a little robot dude patrolling your domicile 24/7 and thwarting the efforts of hooligans at every turn with it's on-board defense system.  Now before you go bombarding me with nonsense about how a robot that's armed to the teeth is not necessarily the safest thing in the world, I've already thought about that.  That's why he'll be armed to the teeth with non-lethal ammo, like bean bags and whatever that stuff Spider-Man shoots from his wrist.

   I don't have the ability to make that a real thing, cause I'm just an idea man.  But Huck Gee has done the hard work of making it look cool, and that's really the first step to full fledged functionality.  The future of home security can be yours for a 24 hour window of time starting this Thursday, March 26th at noon pacific time.  They ain't cheap, but they're all handmade and they will elevate your home to a level of awesomeness you were previously unable to achieve.  Non-lethal awesomeness.

www.huckgee.com

"Full Resin Vinyl" featuring Mutant Vinyl Hardcore x Retroband at Toy Art Gallery

    Some combinations are awesome, like chocolate and peanut butter, or fedoras and creepy dudes.  On paper Mutant Vinyl Hardcore and Retroband don't seem like a pairing you would make for an art show.  One makes crazy Japanese vinyl toys, while the other one makes carded action figures that we all wished we had as kids.  They're seemingly polar opposites, but that's exactly why it's gonna be cool cause there's going to be something for every collector to be amazed by.  Whether your favorite medium is resin, vinyl, or even enormous fiberglass figures, your mind is gonna freak out.  The whole thing happens at Toy Art Gallery tomorrow night starting at 7pm.

Exclusive Green Inner Child from Nerviwr3k x Suburban Vinyl

    Sometimes you shouldn't let your inner child out.  Job interviews come to mind, as do psychiatric evaluations, and parole hearings.  Applying for a gun permit is another, cause they kind of want to make sure you're not a nut.  But just about any other time is completely acceptable so I say go for it, especially if you'll get a good story out of it later.  Just remember that no matter how young you feel inside, you're going to be tried as an adult for jumping into the penguin enclosure at the aquarium.

    The time is nigh to obtain the third colorway of Nerviswr3k's Inner Child figure.  This sucker is clad in Suburban Vinyl green and he will be available exclusively from them tomorrow beginning at noon eastern time in store and online.  Three lucky purchasers will also win an original custom toy from the man himself by finding a special sticker in their box!

Skinner Unleashes a New Batch of Morgogg and Ogos

   

    There's a lot of stuff Tolkien never covered when he wrote about Middle Earth.  We may never know just how intricate their sanitation systems were.  And you can't tell me all that was going on was some eternal struggle between good and evil cause I ain't buying it.  You can't consume your life with finding a ring, or trashing a ring, or bad mouthing Dwarves.  You gotta have some entertainment thrown in there to break up the day and stop you from going crazy.  For some reason ol J.R.R never mentioned the quite popular spectator sport of Orc wrestling, but lucky for you, I know all about it.

    We're not talking about that lame sport that passes for wrestling in high school or the Olympics, with two dudes rolling around on the floor in a passionate embrace.  No, we're talking about full blown sports entertainment, complete with chairs, title belts, and pudgy troll commentators.  Orcs are pretty hard to tell apart (the Elves said it, not me) so you didn't always know if your guy was winning or not, but it didn't matter.  All that matters was that you enjoyed a good night out with the family, ate some hot dogs, and came home with overly priced souvenir cups.  And if someone died.  It was much more of a blood sport than the WWE we know of today.

   Morgogg and Ogos look like they could be the undisputed tag team champions of Orc wrestling.  And no need for them to dig around under the ring looking for something illegal to use, as they come right out with some gnarly looking clubs and bad attitudes to match.  Skinner is set to drop these both in his online store tomorrow, March 20th, at noon pacific time.  There will be 10 of each figure and they will each come with an exclusive 8 x 10 giclee print.  The first person to order each figure will also get a blank black one for free!!!  It's like, too much for me to process right now.

http://shopcriticalhit.com/