"Tales from The Netherknowle" Kickstarter from Taylored Curiosities

    

    Who doesn't love a good adventure?  Most of mine usually end with the line "and that's how we ended up spending our weekend in the emergency room", but that's like a whole separate bonus adventure itself.  Some of the more interesting ones I will tell you about as soon as there is no question whether or not the statute of limitations has passed.  I've seen enough episodes of Scared Straight to know that prison would be the death of me.  Not from a stray shank to the ribs, or from some beast of a man thinking I look like his ex wife, I'm talking about the food.  Have you see what they get fed, cause lunch is pretty much capital punishment.  Your demise may not be as quick as with the electric chair, but you'll be wishing for it the moment your body tries to extract and nutrients from that old bologna sandwich.  That's the kind of adventure I do not need in my life.

    I would, however, be willing to go anywhere with these little dudes.  They're as trustworthy as those beavers from Narnia and I'm sure something magical would happen on your trip.  Maybe you would meet a talking raccoon who wants to chat about the newest season of True Detective, or maybe you would stumble upon a witch's house made of beef wellington.  The possibilities are only limited by your imaginations, which could spell trouble for some of you.  I kid, you know I love you unconditionally.  Or is that conditionally?  Which one is it where you have to do stuff for me or I cut you off?

    Taylored Curiosities wants to send you on an adventure with her newest creations, but in order to start your journey you have to back her Kickstarter campaign.  Check it out here and pack your bags to do some serious exploring.  And watch out for cops cause I will not bail you out.

Cecil The Lion Beanie Baby To Raise Funds for Wildlife Charity

    Yeah, I know, Beanie Babies aren't necessarily tops on my list of things to write about.  But there's nothing that angers me more than people hurting animals so they can feel better about their own short comings (if you get my drift).  The fact that such an act is listed as one of the primary traits of serial killers shouldn't surprise anyone, cause you have to be pretty sick to kill something as beautiful as defenseless.  I've never understood big game hunting, probably because I'm not mentally stunted, and after hearing about Cecil the lion I have been sick down to my very soul.  Sick to think that a fellow human being could do such a thing and even sicker in the pride they feel in it.  So yeah, I'm writing about Beanie Babies today because that's how far my disgust has taken me and it's the only action besides strangling the idiot that killed this magnificent creature that may make me feel slightly better.  

    Next month TY is going to release a special stuffed critter to commemorate Cecil and raise money for WildCRU, which is Oxford University's Wild Conservation Unit and were the folks that were studying the lions in that area.  100% of the proceeds will be donated to them to continue their research into saving the world's endangered species.  At only $5.99, everyone can easily afford to buy one of these and help out a most worthy cause.   

Bella Lee: Noir Edition from Scott Tolleson x Pobber Toys

    Man, I never knew how hard it is to find reasonable people to hire.  I've been trying to help wrangle candidates for my job and it has been no easy task.  To make matters worse, when you find a resume that's worth looking at, sometimes their very name will just ruin it for you.  For instance, how am I supposed to ever be expected to work with someone named Cupcake?  I can't take that seriously, and I refuse to call someone by a name like that, whether their parents actually put that on their birth certificate or not.  And what am I supposed to tell me wife when she asks me about my day?  It's gonna sound like I'm some low-grade pimp with a stable of girls on the corner.

     Bella Lee here had parents that actually thought their daughter could be anything she wanted to be, but even not being named Glitter didn't keep her from a life of questionable employment.  Or she might just be trying to pay down her student loans, in which case I totally understand.  Either way, Scott Tolleson and Pobber are pleased to offer this purrty lady online this Thursday, August 6th, for $120.  This 8 inch resin figure is limited to 50 pieces and only available from www.pobber.com.  

Last Day to Enter the Slugbeard Lottery from Paul Kaiju x Toy Art Galley

    I am getting so old.  Last night Sharon and I went to The Smashing Pumpkins/Marilyn Manson show and I am dragging this morning.  It's the first show we've been to in a long time because frankly, we've seen just about everyone we could ever want to that's still alive,  We used to go to shows all the time so we checked just about everyone of our must-see list.  We've seen both of these bands numerous times, but they are two of our absolute favorites and the show was amazing.  I do have one question though: when did people start watching the shows only through their phones?  Everywhere we looked were people who were just taking pictures and recording snuff film quality footage on their cell phones.  Whats the point of paying to see a band live if you're going to spend the entire time wondering if you got something worthy of uploading to Facebook?  People are weird.  

   All those people could have done something productive with their data plans, like enter the latest Sluggard lottery from Paul Kaiju and Toy Art Gallery.  It ends today at 12pm pacific time and these are the details you need:

Email sales@toyartgallery.com with “Slugbeard Lottery” as the subject along with your paypal address and shipping info. If selected you will be sent an invoice for payment. Please allow 24 hours for a response after the closing time (Monday 12PM PST). Winners will be chosen at random, one entry per participant please (if you submit more than once you will be disqualified). Good luck!

The Brute Low Poly Viking from Jona Dinges x VTSS Toys

    There can never be enough Viking toys out there.  That's not even my opinion, that's pure fact.  So many people in the toy world are inspired by Asian Art, or graphitti, or drug abuse, but Nordic art is sorely under represented.  And it's not like the Vikings weren't creating some beautiful work in between cracking skulls and looting monasteries, it's just people are way more into violence than wood carving.

    Not that this guy was inspired by anything the Vikings created as much as he was their very essence of awesome, but it's still a step closer.  I love this figure drom Jona Dinges x VTSS Toys and if you've got $220 laying around you can love it in person in your own house.  They only made 50 and they should be available today at http://www.vtsstotoys.com.  

What if Mr. T and the TMNT Had a Baby? Dead Greedy Has the Answer For You

    The scenario I described in the title of this post of course would depend on there being female ninja turtles, which is a spin off series I'm shocked no one has done yet.  It would be the perfect plan for Shredder to create chick turtles, thus distracting our heroes long enough to take over the world to the point that there's nothing they could do.  I am really underutilizing my skills as an evil genius.

    My man Dead Greedy is so far ahead of the game though, cause he already had Mr. T swoop in and  woo the green right off of one of those turtle ladies with the promise of gold chains and massive amounts of the pitying of fools.  At this very moment you could snag yourself one of those mini Mr. TMNT in the color of your choice for $20, or get one of each (that's five total) for $75.  Or you could go much bigger, and get a sweet carded version painted up like Michelangelo for $50.  Take a gander at the madness over at http://www.shop.craptasticplastic.com/main.sc. 

Micro Nyagira Custom Series Available Now from Max Toy Co.

    Sharon and I recently took her parents and our niece to a local no-kill animal shelter because they have what is probably the greatest amusement park ride in history.  There's this series of three rooms that house all of the cats that are adoptable and the ones that will live there forever based on various reasons.  The place is wall to wall free roaming cats with a few lawn chairs right smack in the middle.  You go in, you sit down, and you are instantly covered in a mound of kitty snuggles.  I dare Six Flags to come up with anything better.  

    My own house is beyond capacity in the amount of fuzzy friends it already holds, so we have sworn an oath to only welcome plastic kitties in for the time being.  This Micro Niagara custom from Max Toy Company seems to fit that bill quite well.  Hand painted by Mark Nagata in an edition of only 14, there are still a few left over at http://www.maxtoyco.com for $30 each.