More Metal Loving Star Wars Figure from Lisa Rae Hansen

    I bet right now you're at home being all bummed about the fact that you missed out on Lisa Rae Hansen's heavy metal Star Wars mashups.  You couldn't make it it ToyCon Uk and this has started your shame spiral.  You're too depressed to work, your stomach is in a constant state of flux, and the last time you bathed Donald Trump was just a butt clown on a dumb reality show and not a butt clown running for President.  Well it's time to clean the cobwebs out of your bath tub because things are looking up!  Seriously, get to scrubbing.

   To celebrate May the Fourth (be with you, get it?) Lisa is releasing the second half of her Erock and Wookie figures.  They'll be available on the aforementioned date at 6pm BST only from http://ibreaktoys.storenvy.com.  And they come in packaging that you can open and reseal, which is something that has eluded the bigger toy companies for some reason.  Don't make me choose between mint on card or opening a figure to admire its craftsmanship.  That's just cruel.

Introducing "Donny" The Newest Resin Creation from Naomi Knaff

     If you're ever wandering through the woods, as I know many of you are apt to do, and hear a noise that sounds like it could come from this creature, you better run like you just loaded up at the Golden Corral and the nearest toilet is but a lonely speck in the horizon.  See this here is Donny, and despite having a genial name like he would play in your dad's softball league, this dude is all business.  He looks like some sort of devil chicken who's only means of concealing his modesty is one of those bathing suits from Borat (you can Google that if you want to see it, cause there's no way I'm posting a picture of it).  He probably killed Colonel Sanders and has dire intentions for the entire Perdue family.  Did I ever tell you that I met Frank Purdue once at a movie theater?  It was when they released the original Star Wars movies and he and a woman not much older than 30 (dude was like 150 at the time) who looked like she was in training to be a centerfold walked out right behind us and I held the door for him.  His son, who has taken over staring in the tv commercials, was right behind him and had a look that didn't seem to approve of his father's choice in ladies.  I thought he could do worse for a stepmom.

     

    

    Naomi Knaff will be releasing her latest resin creature on Sunday, May 1st, at 5pm eastern time only from http://www.naomiknaff.com.  This sucker stands 7 inches tall and is solid as a brick.  Pick one up before you watch WWE Payback you'll have the best Sunday ever.  

Mecha Top from Inami Toys

    Remember when toys used to be simple?  Of course you don't, cause that was way before any of us were born.  From what I've heard kids would be thrilled to death with an empty can of beans that they could just kick around in the street, or a pile of rocks that they could throw at each other.  When I was a kid all toys consisted of a thousand plastic parts and stickers that had such strong adhesive that if you messed up their placement you ruined the entire thing.  No wonder I'm so OCD now.

    Let us reflect on the simpler times once again with the Mecha Top from Inami Toys.  Combining the classic game of rock, paper, scissors with the always amusing spinning top, this resin creation is a new fun way to gamble with your friends and take all of their money.  I don't believe in friendly competition.

   These are limited to only 8 pieces and will go on sale April 28th at 8pm eastern time from www.inamitoys.com 

Celebrate Alien Day with Super7

   

    Tuesday, April 26 has been officially dubbed "Alien Day".  I don't know if this was something symbolic that they did in congress, I just know I don't have the day off from work to celebrate it to its full potential.  I'm sure it was just some oversight, what with all the primaries and election thingys going on now.  All the important business seems to slip through the cracks.

   The best part about Alien Day is that Super7 is releasing new toys to commemorate it.  You could get yourself a sweet retro action figure case with an exclusive glow in the dark Alien inside, a 3 pack of the Nostromo crew members in special packaging just for the day, or the new 6 inch soft vinyl debut of the Alien Queen in collaboration with Secret Base.  Everything will be available in Super7 stores beginning at 11am pacific time and then online for the rest of us at 7pm pacific time.  

General Tso's Nightmare Release Party at 3DRetro

 
    Oh my goodness you know I need one of these fancy chicken dudes from Frank Kozik and Kidrobot.  It would look so good next to my Colonel plastic bank that I got at the end of last summer. There he was, shining like a plastic beacon of amazing in an antique shop in Washington State, and I knew I had to have him.  The dude is an icon of deliciousness and deserves to be celebrated for his achievement.  I also bought a metal wall hanging that depicts two elk that some dude with a torch carved out, but that's not really relevant to anything or I would have brought that up sooner.

    Is this an homage to secret herbs and spices, a depiction of what eating too much chicken will do to you, or the penance that a southern gentleman now faces who built an empire on the backs of genetically enhanced poultry?  Why don't you ask Frank himself when he appears at 3DRetro in Glendale, California on Friday April 29th to celebrate this toy's release.  They'll have both the regular white version and some of the black and gold Kidrobot exclusive editions for sale and if you ask real nice maybe Frank will draw you a smorkin chicken on the bucket-shaped packaging.  Or maybe he'll be mad at me for suggesting that and having to draw farm foul all night long.  Oops.

   The whole shindig starts at 7pm and lasts till the fun runs out (or some predetermined time I don't know about).  Supposedly there will be actual fried chicken there as well, which is the sign of a good party if you ask me.

Mixed Parts Mini Mockbats from Paul Kaiju X Unbox Industries

    In the summer I always look like I'm made of mixed parts, cause my head, neck and arms will be tan, while the rest of me is the color of one of those cave slugs.  I never try to get tan in the shape of my shorts and tshirt, it's just the hand I've been dealt as a modest dude who refuses to walk around without a shirt on.  Not only would it make me uncomfortable, but I feel as a responsible nipple owner it is my duty to keep them safe.  I've said too much.

   These suckers are gonna sell out so fast and be all over Instagram in plenty of situations that will make you mad jealous if you can't participate.  So when these Mockbats from Paul Kaiju and Unbox Industries go on sale Saturday April 23 you best be ready to get one.  They're sold blind so you can't pick the colors, but just getting one is gonna be so awesome it won't matter which color combo you get.  They're only going to be available from store.unboxindustries.info.

Dresden Lady Wave 1 from 3A

    Warfare is getting weird.  Just when you think countries are going to be leveling each other from afar with those remote controlled drone things (and you thought they were just for creeps trying to record you through your window) I see something like this.  I mean, I guess if I was going to be gunned down having it come courtesy of a killer pair of legs isn't so bad.  The getting gunned down part still sucks mind you, but at least I'd be distracted as my body spontaneously erupted my guts everywhere.  It's all about perspective.

    3A is unleashing the latest in infantry on April 28th when these three maidens of the battlefield will be available.  Each one will be $160 through http://www.bambalandstore.com.