Naomi Knaff's Resin Releases for DesignerCon

    Today in the United States we are deciding who it is we will collectively complain about as president for the next four years.  Every time a new election rolls around tons of us can be seen posting online that if our candidate doesn't win we're moving to Canada!  Well I hate to break it to you, but Canada doesn't want us.  Unless you have a highly sought after skill like being a nuclear engineer or professional moose wrestler, our neighbors to the north just aren't that interested.  And who can blame them, because we can be loud, and we rarely put the seat down when we're done in the bathroom.   I'm understand completely Canada, and I still love Tim Hortons and your clean cities, and your lack of violent crime.  

    Naomi Knaff just happens to be Canadian (see how I tied it all together there) and is making the trek from the Great White North all the way to California for next weekend's DesignerCon.  She'll have a load of her crazy resin creations with her, some of which you can see right here:

 
    And she'll be debuting a collaboration with Magitarius, which you can also see right here:

    When Lisa Frank has a nightmare do you think it looks something like these?  I bet it does.  You should visit Naomi at booth # 1015, but only if you want to own the most creative resin toys out there or if you're trying to get her to smuggle you across the border.  

Your Favorite tokidoki Characters Are Getting the XXRay Treatment from Jason Freeny x Mighty Jaxx

     Is there no toy safe from the intrusive blade of Jason Freeny?  His surgeon's blade has allowed him to take a childhood curiosity of an object's inner workings and transform it into a mad obsession with turning beloved characters into anatomical studies.  Actually, I think these are really cute and I'm just lamenting because my wife is a huge tokidoki fan and I know she's going to want these, which means I'm gonna have to start skipping meals or something.  Being a good husband is hard work.

    Mighty Jaxx will be releasing the first two figures in this collaboration on Saturday, November 12th through their website www.mightyjaxx.rocks.  If history is any indication these should be really affordable which is good for you fellow ballers on a budget, because like I mentioned before, these are merely the first two and more are on their way.  

Rotten Rex "Meat Marbled" Version from James Groman x Lulubell Toys

    I shouldn't be writing about this toy because it is making me hungry and I still have to go grocery shopping today.  Now I'm just gonna skip everything else I would have bought and go straight for the meat aisle and load my basket up with steak.  My wife makes this amazing steak with onion soup mix that will make you smack your grandma it's so good.  Don't try and sue me after you smack her either, cause I will lawyer up so fast you'll wish I didn't lawyer up so fast.

   You can own the only dinosaur I'ver ever thought might taste good during a two week open preorder happening right now through Lulubell Toys.  This monstrosity from James Groman stands 15 inches tall and doesn't look like he would take too kindly to any T-Rex arm jokes.  $250 will guarantee you one by visiting http://www.lulubelltoys.com.  

Odyssey 2 from The Sucklord

    The Sucklord released two new figures this week, but one already sold out so there's no point in me making you fall in love with it just to break your heart the way Jenny did in third grade when she knew you liked her yet kissed Michael by the swing set any way.  I'm no Jenny.  So I'm going to tell you about the one still available for purchase called Odyssey 2.  This is in no way the bangin sequel to Homer's epic Greek tale that we will seemingly never get (Even though it takes Guns and Roses less time to record an album. Step it up, Homer!) but is in fact a tribute to classic video games of the past.  It harkens to a time when somehow people were able to have fun with two pixelated sticks and a ball that bounced back and forth and didn't need things like "sex" or "violence" in their video game systems.  Sounds boring.  

    Pick this dude up here and never forget how blessed you are to have grown up with Grand Theft Auto.  

Rise of Rudolph 3 Inch Dunny from Frank Kozik x Kidrobot

    I wrote an entire children's story about this new Dunny from Frank Kozik and Kidrobotwww.kidrobot.com for their website at blog.kidrobot.com so I was just going to tell you to go read that, which you should do anyway.  Seriously, your children will want you to read it to them before they go to bed each night because they deserve to hear the real truth about the North Pole industrial machine.  But then I just kept typing and now this has become more than just a post about a post; it has become it's own, standalone post that merely references a post, so in a sense it's like three posts yet only two.  No, seriously this all makes sense because I thought about it a lot.  And it's Guy Fawkes day, where British folks celebrate the dude who tried to blow up Parliament.  Did his moment of rebellion inspire more than plastic masks and a graphic novel and also light the fuse in everyone's favorite reindeer to stop taking Santa's crap?  Do you see how easy it is to connect all of these events and drive yourself mad with conspiracy theories?  Why are my cats starring at me like they're recording all of this?

    Celebrate Christmas the way it was intended by picking up this 3 inch Dunny now from Kidrobot.com and wherever designer toys are sold.  

Kaiju Frankenstein from Nathan Hamill x Touma x 3DRetro

    This is what happens when you take those trips down to Mexico in an effort to save on plastic surgery.  There are many ways to become fiscally responsible, like cutting down on your visits to Starbucks, or hitchhiking wherever you need to go, but invasive medical procedures should be at the bottom of that list.  Along with cable television, because that is a necessity.

   Frankenstein's dueling personas aren't the result of a medical vacation in Tijuana though.  He's feeling a bit torn because he was created by two different folks.  Nathan Hamill designed one side, Touma the other and then 3DRetro slapped em together to create this conflicted looking monster.  Do you think they share one brain and always agree, or do you think that like conjoined twins they have their own personalities that fight to be unique?  Pick one up at www.3dretro.com for $49.99 and create your own narrative.  

Winter Reindeer: Night Stalker Edition from Andrew Bell x Gary Ham x Pobber Toys

 

    I have an entertainment center from Ikea that has been a pain in my rear since the day I bought it.  For one, it was the wrong color, which Sharon and I decided we would live with.  Then when we moved it somehow gained about 300 pounds since I put it together and nearly killed us both.  And the thing is so massive and holds so much stuff that it has made it an almost impossible task to replace.  We did swear an oath though that if we were to ever move again not only would we not take it with us, but that we would destroy it so it could not pass its evil onto others.  And by destroy it I mean carefully take the bolts out and even more carefully walk the pieces to the dumpster.  I'll be damned if it sends me to the emergency room in one final act of defiance.

   Let that be a lesson on how important it is to carefully select the things you use to display your treasures, for like an at-home haircut, it may be there longer than you bargained for.   Enter Pobber Toys.  They teamed up with Gary Ham to create the original version of this unique way to display your figures and now Andrew Bell has put his own spin on it.  This thing is nearly two and a half feet tall of resin and can be left the way he is or fully loaded with your favorite toys as seen here:

    You have from now until November 30th to preorder one of these things for $499 plus shipping and they are only making the amount that people order.  There will be no second chances, only massively crushing regret that will hinder you in the rest of your worldly pursuits if you don't get one.  Make the right decision by visiting http://pobber.bigcartel.com.