Witch Queen Resin Figure from Junko Mizuno x Kidrobot

     As much as I enjoy watching HGTV, I feel there is a portion of the population they just don't cater to. Every time any of their shows are doing a remodel it's all about open concepts and creating space for entertaining. And everything is as sterile looking as the waiting area in an emergency room. If I had a show it would be all about fixing these disasters: adding walls back in so you can hang all of your artwork, taking all of those hideous barn doors outside and burning them like they deserve, and making it look like people with real life personalities actually live there. Also, the outside of the house has to look like an evil forest witch would live there. Your lawn is now an overgrown hedge maze and we filled your pool with swamp critters. Enjoy!

    Witches always make the best design choices and this one from Junko Mizuno would certainly be no exception. Just look at how awesome she is. I bet her house is loaded with cool stuff and not a single bare wall in sight. She and Kidrobot have certainly outdone themselves with this eight inch tall resin sculpture that could easily be the centerpiece in any collection. This beauty retails for $149.95 and is available for preorder now at this link. 

Space Godzilla from Mondo

    

     Adding the word "space" to most things will turn it into something impossible to take seriously. For example there's Space Force, the new branch of the military we somehow needed? You know you laughed when you heard about it because it sounds absolutely ridiculous. Space Godzilla could very well have followed the same fate, had he not been so killer looking. The dude has giant crystal shoulder pads like some reptilian linebacker and more jewels from head to toe than Elizabeth Taylor's estate sale. And he does all this while looking mean as hell, so how can you not absolutely love him? Remember when Jason from Friday the 13th went to space? Yeah, things could have turned out like that. 

     Mondo has been churning out some of the best Godzilla figures I've seen recently and they are set to debut the first colorway of Space Godzilla this Tuesday, February 7th at 12pm ct . Inspired by his look in the film, this version is limited to 400 pieces and will retail for $150 when it goes on sale at www.mondoshop.com.

Earn Points Towards Free Toys With Tenacious Toys

 

    I love free stuff. There are a few things I would not accept when they are free such as gunshot wounds, head lice, industrial waste, incurable diseases, and Donald Trump NFTs, but most other things I'm willing to at least consider. Once, I found a gigantic fiber glass Frankenstein at the dump that someone had constructed around a toilet for some haunted house gag and I seriously pondered dragging it home because it was free. The strength required to NOT have that sitting in my living room when my wife got home means that God has made me too powerful and no one is ready for how that may play out.

    In the spirit of free things, have you signed up for the Tenacious Toys rewards program yet? You're gonna buy stuff anyway, so you might as well earn points towards even more stuff that you don't have to pay for. Personally, I plan on leaving this world surrounded by cool things like an Egyptian Pharoah, and this is exactly the sort of thing to help me reach my goals. 

    And I've made it super easy for you to participate. Simply click on the logo in this post or on the big blue doggie on the right! I've done all the hard work for you and now all you have to do is go shopping!!

Anomalli Plush Aliens from Alleh Rosello

 

    Happy new year !!!!!  It is now 2023 and I refuse to say anything stupid like "this is gonna be my year" because the last few times I did that some super weird and not so great stuff happened. So 2023 is gonna be whatever it's gonna be and I'll do my best to be surprised when everything goes to hell or turns out amazing. 

     Will aliens finally show up and interrupt my watching of Married at First Sight with news footage of their arrival? That would be a surprise that could go south real quick, especially if they decide to kill us all and I never find out how the season ends. Imagine dying and not ever knowing who is staying together and who is getting a divorce? My afterlife will be so restless. 

    Alleh Rosello has been making alien figures for a while and now she has translated her resin and sofubi design into a much less threating plush version. Available in two different colors, this little dude from outer space can't wait to get all snuggled up to you and then run experiments in your guts. I mean, that probably won't happen, but then again nothing in this life is guaranteed, including the safety from a very personal alien invasion.

     Get yours at https://www.spacebehbehs.com/.

Relic of a Jupiter Tomb by Skinner x House of Gog

 

    Anyone my age that spent their younger years watching late night television in the hopes that the scrambled version of Cinemax would come into focus just long enough to see something of interest, remembers Miss Cleo. She was the woman who looked like a lunch lady and had a convincing Jamaican accent that would implore you to call her 1-900 number so she could tell you your fortune. She was dialed into the cosmos and could see forwards, backwards, and sideways and for the low price of $3.99 per minute she'd be happy to tell you all about it. I never had the nerve to try it myself, for I was less worried about the future than I was my stepfather getting the phone bill and the ensuing hell that would cause. I did consult a fortune teller on a Jersey Shore boardwalk once like Bruce Springsteen did, and the only thing I got out of that was my debit card number stolen.

    I would be easy to convince that Skinner had a direct line to some otherworldly folks and used them as the inspiration for his work, kind of like Pickman's Model. Is he warning us about what lies beyond the veil, just waiting for their chance to inhabit our minds like fleshy Oldmobiles, or is it that the monsters have always lived deep within us and he is the only one with a torch and the bravery to light the way to their discovery? 

    Relic of a Jupiter Tomb is the latest collaboration from the visionary artist and statue makers House of Gog. Prepare to have your psyche melted like a grilled cheese sandwich at a Phish show by this one. Standing nine inches tall and featuring a removable helmet with two different faces, you get a lot of look that you can change up on a whim, or when that little voice in your head that may or may not belong to you suggests it. Limited to 300 pieces and retailing for $325, you can preorder yours on Thursdsday, December 1st at 3pm eastern time at www.houseofgog.com. 

Racks Vinyl Figure from Vandul

     By now you know I didn't win the two billion dollar Powerball lottery, because if I had I wouldn't have typed any of this. I would be busy hiring a financial team to make sure I didn't end up like those dummies who lose all their cash and go broke five years later. I'd still buy plenty of dumb stuff like a spitting cobra fountain for the drive way, but I'd like to not get evicted and that be the last thing I see as they close what used to be my electrified security gate behind me. I'd also still eat mostly chicken nuggets and Minute Rice because it's important to remember your roots and because they're the perfect food combo no matter how rich you are. 

    I'm guessing Vandul didn't win either, mainly because he didn't say anything about it on Twitter. He did however say that he's got his brand new vinyl toy dropping this Friday. Named Racks, this wad of currency is masked up and looks like he just pulled a fast one on some unsuspecting sucker. Hopefully it was a big corporation who has been robbing us blind in the name of "inflation" while reporting record profits. I digress. 

    Each figure stands six inches tall and this version is limited to 100 pieces. You can snag yours on Friday, November 11th at 1pm central time from https://vandul.co/.

Familiars and Foes Board Game Kickstarter from Horrible Adorables

 

    I haven't played a game in years before last Christmas when my niece got one that forced you to find out which person in the group was a werewolf. Everyone involved, besides her, were a little skeptical that it was gonna be corny but we reluctantly agreed to play anyway. It started off slow for a few rounds as we got a basic understanding of the rules, but by the 20th or so time we were full-on investigating people for lycanthropy like we were detectives solving a murder. Accusations were thrown about haphazardly, things from the past were brought up when weighing who had a history of stretching the truth in real life, and I got so caught up deflecting suspicion away from me that I erred by trying to cast doubt on my mother in law, who is as close to sainthood as you can get without the Pope saying so. I'm surprised I haven't been excommunicated for my error and forced to live alone in the woods. 

     Judging by the look of this new project from Horrible Adorables, the likelihood of this game erupting into a full blown family crisis seems unlikely. Familiar and Foes is a board game that takes the work of the husband and wife art duo into realms beyond your walls or shelves. Here is a rundown of the game from the creators themselves:

    Familiars and Foes is a 1 to 5 player cooperative style game. You take the role of a young spell slinging Familiar trying to rescue your witches and wizards from a horde of evil Foes. Your character begins as a base elemental Familiar (Earth, Air, Water, Fire, or Aether) and you must work to fully evolve your Familiar by completing a series of training tasks. The game is played in four waves that progressively increase in difficulty. New sets of Foes are revealed with each wave of battle that must be defeated to save your coven. The game is won when all the Foes have been defeated, all the witches and wizards have been rescued, and at least one Familiar is still standing.

   Sounds preeeetty cool, right? But, it's only cool if it becomes a reality, and that's where you come in. The project is live now on Kickstarter and is actually fairly close to being funded. That means with just an extra little push you and your friends could soon have a brand new obsession for game night. Check out this link and see all the cool rewards that are available, which include everything from the game itself, to toys, and their famous felt sculptures.