oddFAUNA at Designer Con

    There are many mysteries in the world.  Are ghosts real?  Will we ever capture the Loch Ness Monster?  Will the Kardashians ever go extinct (please)?  Mysteries are abound in the toy world as well.  I have a list of people that I can't believe larger companies haven't made deals with yet to produce their work and oddFAUNA is at the top.  Look how awesome these little dudes are, and she makes them all herself.  Emma SanCartier is the woman behind these critters and the only way to get one for yourself is directly from her.  She will be appearing at this weekend's Designer Con so if you're lucky enough to be going you should stop by and check out her work at booth #706.  Here are more of the things she will have available.  

    I'm loving this little wolf guy.  Tell me that wouldn't look amazing in Japanese sofubi.  I wish I had the funds to make it happen.  

Art Attack Toys Exclusive "Mutant B" Edition Bad Ass from Kronk x Pobber Toys for Designer Con

    Monkeys are tricky.  You see em sitting around, looking all cute and stuff like little fuzzy people and then BAM, they rip your arms off and beat you to death with your bloody limbs.  Finally, there is a giant monkey that is advertising the fact that he is mean and will kill you.

    You've seen this dud before but never like this.  This is Bad Ass from Kronk x Pobber Toys and he is featured here in a special Mutant B edition.  He is an exclusive for Art Attack Toys and they will have him for sale at this weekend's Designer Con.  Only 50 of them exist and you can snag one at booth # 806.  

3DRetro Exclusives for Designer Con

    If the lights happen to go out at Designer Con, signaling the fact that North Korea has finally invaded us, then the 3DRetro booth will be the safest place to run to, as their whole booth is gonna glow like Three Mile Island.

    First up, we have the special glowy MoonSHINE Edition of Scott Tolleson's Bitta Critta.  Little known fact about me:  I'm not actually from New Jersey, I just live here now.  I actually grew up in Virginia, and whenever anyone learns that they all want to know a.) do I watch those moonshine shows on tv and b.) can I help them make some.  The answer to both of those questions is surprisingly no, though the second one does sound exciting.  I could be the Walter White of New Jersey party juice.  The figure will be $50, while hiring me to build you a still will be substantially more as soon as I Google how to do it.  

  Get all this and more at booth #104. (That was meant to be sung, like a jingle)

    Also something that may come as a shock to you is that I don't have any good stories involving bats or human skulls.  I do get a kick out of the giant fruit bats at the Philadelphia Zoo, as they look like foxes with wings.  That is cute and also horrifying at the same time, because what if foxes learned how to fly?  And then the coyotes would learn, and the wolves, and we would be getting dive bombed by predatory mammals on a daily basis.  And you think getting pooped on by a bird is bad, a wolf poop dropped from high enough could probably give you a concussion.  

    This is of course Strife and Sire from Nathan Hamill.  These two guys glow too and are also $50.  I'm detecting a distinct theme here.  Nathan will also have prints available that he collaborated on with Pronto Pixel for $30 that are ready to snazz up your living space.  

DKE Exclusive Bones Figure from Mike Egan at Designer Con

    This, is by far, the best Mike Egan toy release ever.  You lucky folks that are going to Designer Con this weekend will be able to score this hand painted Bones (the first time with wings!!!) figure housed in his own hand painted coffin.  DKE Toys will only have 25 of these morbid must-haves and they will be $150 each.  I am officially jealous of everyone who lives in California.  We really need something like this on the East Coast, like during the Spring when nothing else is going on and the weather is nice.  Someone make it happen and then give me credit for the idea.  Thanks.  

Epic Time Suck of the Week: Lego Marvel Super Heroes

    I loooooooooooooooove these Lego games.  It never takes a long time to beat the story mode of them, but it's all the extra stuff you can do that really makes you lose track of your day and allows your garbage to fester to the point where you at least have to throw it on the porch or risk gassing yourself out of he house.  Sure, I could have vacuumed, or did the dishes, but neither one of those things is as fulfilling as finding all of the little super hero mini figures.  And you know what happened when I actually left the house yesterday to get groceries?  Some lady behind me accidently tears open a bag of raw chicken and spills the juice all over one of the self checkout lanes.  It seeped all inside the machine, and got all over her.  Because there obviously is a God, I was finished my transaction and on my way out the door by the time someone came to her rescue with a roll of paper towels.  Now do you see how much safer it is to just stay home and play video games?  I could have died of salmonella poisoning from someone throwing raw chicken around.  The worst that's ever happened to me at home was that time I stubbed and broke my pinky toe and my whole foot turned black. Didn't even come close to killing me though, I just had to walk with a limp for a few days.  And deal with Sharon making fun of me.  Which has irritated me for years until this text message exchange the other day:

Sharon:  Remember that time you broke your toe and I made fun of you, well I'm really sorry.

Me:  Did something happen?

Sharon:  I BROKE MY TOE AND IT'S GONNA TURN BLACK AND FALL OFF AND YOU WON'T EVER BE ABLE TO LOVE ME AGAIN

Me:  Awwww baby, can you bend it.

Sharon: yes

Me:  It's not broken.

Sharon:  Well it hurts and I need new shoes and beef jerky to make it feel better.

    For a split second there karma had enacted vengeance for her making fun of me.  Then karma obviously got busy with something else and let her turn it into a shopping trip.  Focus, karma, focus!

Super Mondo Epic Review Time: Tenacious Toys Exclusives

    Look at me gettin all outdoorsy for this review.  You would think I was working for Bass Pro Shops or something.  Benny from Tenacious Toys asked me for my address the other day and since I've met the guy in person before I wasn't too concerned about what he was gonna do with that informations.  So I've waited patiently, not knowing whether to expect a box in the mail or a hit man (I get paranoid sometimes).  Luckily for me, it was the former and it was filled with exclusive toys that you can only get from Benny himself.  Now I shall share with you my thoughts on them.  Prepare yourself.

    The first picture you see up there is the Zombie Goo New York Comic Con Biohazard Edition.  You will also notice my heating and air conditioning unit on the left.  I never claimed that I was Annie Liebovitz.  VISEone is the man behind this toy that looks like it stepped (or crawled) straight out of a Stephen King novel.  In fact, I'm surprised he hasn't written a story about tubes of products that come to life and kill you.  Just think, you're going to brush your teeth one day and a hand reaches out from the tube and starts attacking you.  And there you are, just trying to prevent gingivitis.  

    It's a really weird toy to say the least, but I mean that in a good way.  It's weird because most designer toys are some sort of full fledged character, where this one is more like a snap shot of terror captured in plastic.   Does the rest of the zombie eventually come out of the tube to eat you, or is this his fully realized form and he's just as deadly the way he is?  There's a few different ways to look at it and maybe it will inspire someone to write a good story about it.  It pushes the boundaries of what a toy can be and that makes it an interesting piece.  As a bonus, the box also comes signed by the artist, which is cool because he lives in Germany and mailing big toys back and forth (it stands 8 inches tall) isn't cheap.  But you can get the whole thing right now for only $40!!! Try and get a designer toy this big anywhere else for that price, I dare you.  

    Alex Pardee's Bunnywith character has had a lot of ups and downs.  He's been transformed into everything you can imagine, and this time he has taken the form of one Jabba the Hut.  I've seen this dude online before but never in person, so I was kind of shocked at how big he was.  I thought that he was the size of a M.U.S.C.L.E. figure, but this is him sitting next to a 3 inch Dunny:

    That's a lot of intergalactic slug for only $12.  This is the perfect toy if you're a Star Wars nerd, a bunny nerd, a plastic Star Wars bunny nerd, or if you just fancy the color blue like Winona Ryder in Heathers:

    I wonder if she'll see this.  If so, Winona, you have now made my life complete knowing that you have read these words.  If not, I just sounded like a weirdo for nothing.  But hey, at least I have a cool toy to look at right?  And you can too if you would accept Bunnywith into your life in exclusive Tenacious blue.  

    I changed it up a bit in this picture and lined all these little dudes up on my porch.  I try to keep it unpredictable, so you'll come back everyday just to see what kind of shenanigans are going on.  Plus they wouldn't all stand up in the dirt without me burying their feet and getting them filthy.  I'm trying to keep these guys as pure white as possible.  This is the Tenacious exclusive white OMFG series 2 figure set.  Though you don't have to leave em plain if you don't want to.  Paint em up and make em look fancy.  I just know that I don't have the required steady hand to paint something this small without making them look like Marilyn Manson caught in a rain storm.  There's 5 figures total but I decided that the knight's puke could stand alone as his own dude, so if you agree with me then there are 6.  What's great about these guys is that even though they're small they pack a lot of detail, which is something that toys this size aren't always able to do.   

    Well there you have it.  I think I kept on topic through most of it, which as you know is hard for me to do.  All of these are available as we speak at www.tenacioustoys.com.  So go on, treat yourself to something nice.  You work hard and deserve it.  

"Toxic Green" A Clockwork Carrot by Frank Kozik x Blackbook Toy for Designer Con

    Our humble narrator looks a little green around the gills.  Perhaps this is a homage to Alex's treatment kicking in anytime he tries to partake in a bit of the ultra violence.  Perhaps he just lives near one of those super fund sites that we have scattered all over New Jersey.  Whatever the case may be, you can bring one of these "Toxic Green" editions of Frank Kozik's x Blackbook Toys A Clockwork Carrot home with you when they are released at Designer Con this weekend.  Limited to only 50 pieces, you can get one at booth #318.  They assure me that he is neither radioactive nor will he puke on the car ride home.  I've been lied to about both of those things before, but I still married Sharon anyway.