Metacrypt's Shub Zeroth Misfortune Bags for SDCC

    I could use a good bag.  I've always got papers laying around and I find myself looking for something to put them in.  It used to be my important documents wok, until one of my cats peed in it and made doing my taxes that year really awkward for my accountant lady. Now it just consists of a plastic Wal-Mart bag that once held my Cap'n Crunch, then I toss it down the steps of my basement and forget where I put everything.  You think being so self aware of my problem that I could put a stop to it, maybe even develop a system to put away those papers I didn't really know what to do with, like the deed to the house and my medical bills that I can't seem to throw out or pay either.  But I say nay,  my "pack things in bags and throw them down the basement steps" filing method is still very valid because I still have a lot of basement left.  Maybe the real problem is I don't really have a nice enough bag for my important papers that would elevate them to a more, dare I say, important status.

    Problem solved!!!  The folks at Metacrypt are releasing a killer Misfortune Bag at San Diego Comic Con filled with all kinds of goodness.  And this ain't no brown paper lunch sack either suckas, it's a full on canvas bag featuring that graphic you see above there, which is perfect for all those birthday cards your mee maw and paw paw send you.  But gaze inside and things get even better, as each bag contains a  random big ol Shub Zeroth figure and two companion dudes and other goodness that's a surprise.  The bags are limited and at $150 are probably cheaper than a cab ride to the show.  Or not, I've never even been to California so who am I to riff on the particulars of public transit.

 
     Ok, I know not all of us are the most adventurous of folks and like to pick the exact figures we want.  Some people would say that's the sign of being a control freak, but hey, I'm not here to judge you to your face.  Artist Candie Bolton did five Blacklight Rainbow version of Shub, each being $130, or snag yourself one of the most amazing marbled versions for only $100.  Marbled Japanese vinyl is THE BEST.  Seriously, it's like something only rich people should be able to have, but there it is, available to us all.  It's a gift.  Random Drudes for $20 each will also be available,  ready and willing to worship your entire toy collection.

    Plus...oh yeah, there's a plus....there will be t-shirts and patches and lots of other stuff.  And I'm told there will be Brian Ewing, being that this is all at his booth and stuff, and he's half of the Metacrypt team (the other half being Rocket Society/Hateball, FYI).  It's all happening at booth # 4503.  

Frank Kozik x Rotofugi x Squibbles Ink Exclusive "Jerome" for SDCC

    I'm probably going to get hit for telling this story, but it makes me laugh every time I think of it, so a black eye might be worth it.  Don't say I've never bled for my art.

    We live a short drive from Wildwood, NJ , which is somewhat akin to purgatory by the sea.  See, people with kids a who are really afraid of germs go to Ocean City, while those of us that like to people watch and aren't concerned about catching a criminal record go to Wildwood.  Obviously the wife and I gravitate towards the latter, so every summer we get excited to almost get run over by the tram car and watch silly tourists have their food stolen by seagulls the size of golden retrievers.  Once while walking down the boardwalk my wife grabs me by the arm and has a concerned look plastered across her face.  I thought maybe she lost her wallet, or left her phone in the car, but I never could have expected what she told me:

"My mole fell off."

    After taking a moment to process what I just heard, she showed me a mark on her shoulder that had once housed the now absconded mole.  Evidently the strap of her purse had acted like a makeshift saw, cutting that sucker at the root and separating it from the rest of her body.  I knew I couldn't miss an opportunity this, as how many times will skin imperfections find themselves flying off my wife's epidermis?  I told her that I saw something drop from her shoulder but just thought it was a piece of lint from her tank top and it landed in a woman's ice cream as she passed by us.  

   The look on her face was a mix of horror and hilarity as I tried my best to convince her that some stranger was ingesting and oddly shaped and textured sprinkle even as we spoke.  I even pointed out the lady that was turning into an unwilling canibal courtesy of her frozen treat.  "I wonder if she's going to wake up tomorrow with a craving she can't explain to ingest every blemish she see." Sharon wasn't buying it and I ended up with a bruised arm for nothing but even now it still makes me laugh.  

    I don't think there are any moles hidden in Jerome's swirly little head, but he does like to smoke so you may find a stray ash or two.  Frank Kozik's ice cream bro will be making his debut at San Diego Comic Con courtesy of the folks that produced him, Rotofugi and Squibbles Ink.  But fear not those of you who crave nicotine-addicted dairy products, for there will be an online release to follow shortly after for those of us not at the convention.    

    

Enter Skeletor's Lair at Super7 San Diego During SDCC

    Is Super7 going for some Guniness World Record to have the most San Diego Comic Con Exclusives ever?  Not only have they loaded up their booth inside the convention, but they're utilizing their retail space in the city for a whole different event entirely.  Skeletor's Lair is taking over their store with the best Masters of the Universe exclusives you've ever laid eyes on.  But you can't just walk up to the door and be let in, that would be too easy.  You gotta score yourself one of these special tokens from either Super7's booth #4945 or Mattel's #3029 for admission.  Once inside you're gonna probably loose your mind and need medical attention after seeing what's available to purchase.  Here's part one of my rundown for you.  

    You could buy all of these M.U.S.C.L.E. inspired figures and because they're so small, convince yourself that you need way more stuff.  And then you'll get back to your hotel room, open em all up and have a ton of toys to spread out on the bed and roll around on like Scrooge McDuck.  Not that that's exactly what I do after a long day of shopping at a convention and after I confiscate my wife's phone to ensure there is no photographic evidence of it.  

    You wanna get fancier with your He-Man collection?  Then you're gonna need these exclusive resin He-Man and Skeletor resin figures from Amanda Visell.  Both were hand cast and painted and are extremely limited/more awesome than anything you currently own.  

                                         

    Let me tell you something.  If you wanna know what's something people are going to be nuts for during and well after the conventions, it's these four figures you see here.  Super7 not only caused a frenzy with their Alien prototype set, but they created a whole new series of action figures that are available just about everywhere.  If you're a collector that is also interested in watching a toy's value grow, these are a no brainer.

    How has this never existed before?  Whoever made this happen is a genius and I want one pretty badly.  This official Moss Man Chia pet is limited to one per person, but I would need two of them because you can't not grow the thing.  But then it would kill me that I didn't have one mint in the box because yeah, I'm kinda weird like that.  Now I have a headache.  

    You know what makes these test shot figures great?  The shear size of them.  I'd fill my house with giant sized Skeleton figures no problem, which may be why I have to take medication to be a functioning part of society.  

"Cosmic Beast" Manotaur from Rampage Toys x Imps and Monsters

    Whatchu know about a Manotaur?  That dude's head is straight on fire!!!  How nuts is that?  Maybe not as nuts as your Uncle Carl, who truth be told no human being should ever be left alone with, but pretty nuts regardless.  Could you ever have a bad hair day is your hair was one big flame?  It would constantly change so before you could even think to get upset it would be different.  Problems like this are why I don't get anything done.

    Rampage Toys and Imps and Monsters are proud to present to you this insanely awesome Cosmic Beast Manotaur.  Only 10 of them were made and they are available right now by visiting http://www.impsandmonsters.com.

Exclusive Germ S005 [ROACH] from Ferg x Rotofugi for SDCC

    I used to sell home security systems in Philadelphia.  Unfortunately to do that, you have to actually go into people's homes, which can be more of an adventure than you ever bargained for.  Now don't get me wrong, I am a sucker for a good estate sale, but those people are dead and someone at least put a little bit of effort into making the house more presentable and less of a death trap.  I'm talking literal death, not that figural nonsense either.

    My salesman days involved entering a lot of homes but one I will never forget, mostly because I wake up at least once a month in terror from the nightmares it still induces.   My boss was with me for this appointment and when we walked in he just looked at me like this was gonna be a bad one.  We sit down on the couch and the entire time we're talking it sounds like the drywall is gonna get up and walk right out.   Then we started to see them on the floor, these brazen little critters that couldn't have been less afraid of two dumb human beings.  We were both ready to get out of there and thankfully the customer balked at the price so we took that opening, said our goodbyes, and itched for weeks afterwards.  

   I've been lucky enough to not encounter another roach infestation in my life, but I'd be willing to fill my house with these instead.  Ferg is dropping these exclusive Germ S005 [ROACH] dudes through the Rotofugi/Squibbles Ink booth at San Diego Comic Con.  There are only 100 of these available at $150 each.  Read up on www.rotofugi.com for the pertinent details so you don't miss out.  

Sextopigon "Dark Void" Edition from Skinner x Unbox Industries Releases Today!!!!

    Stare, stare into the appropriately titled "Dark Void" edition of the mighty Sextopigon.  His skin is the night sky, his blood the fading light of long dead suns.  Will he foretell your future?  Will he be the last thing you see before your death?  Will I continue to be so dramatic?  Who can say for sure, but you can get one of your own soul priests from Skinner and Unbox Industries when they go on sale today at http://store.unboxindustries.info.  The time of your demise is set at 22:00 BST.    

SDCC Exclusive Snybora from Chris Ryniak x Squibbles Ink x Rotofugi

    Doesn't this dude look like he wants to strike up a conversation with you?  Like at any moment he will start waxing poetic about how this season of True Detective is way better than the first one because the dialogue, while still seemingly written by someone on mushrooms, has the benefit of not having to be delivered by that stoner in the Lincoln commercials (he's not up on famous Hollywood actors).  Oh, and he absolutely has a British accent, as he was Oxford educated, but doesn't like to talk about it to avoid being labeled a snob.  

    Chris Ryniak's Snybora is going all exclusive for San Diego Comic Con in this sweet green paint scheme.  This pretty little lizard man bro will be available at Rotofugi and Squibbles Ink's booth #5248 for $35 each.  Buy me one and I'll let you decide where he's gonna live in my house.  You have no idea what a big step that is for me and my OCD.